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Food for Living: Face Your Fears
By Henry Ukazu
Greeting dear Friends,
I will start this article with a quote from Les Brown: “Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” Growth is a very hard process. Growth comes in different shapes and sizes, but what is important is we are growing. Some people grow with joy, while others grow with fear. Regardless of where your fear is coming from, it should be accepted with joy because fear itself comes with its own blessing if only you can see from the brighter side of life. Fear itself is indeed necessary for our growth.
We all have fear living in us. Politicians have the fear of the unknown, and entrepreneurs of succeeding in their craft. We all have dreams and visions we will like to see come through.
What really is fear? Fear can be defined as a feeling induced by perceived danger or threat that occurs in certain types of organisms, which causes a change in metabolic and organ functions and ultimately a change in behavior, such as fleeing, hiding, or freezing from perceived traumatic events. At various points in our life, we have experienced fear. The fear of the unknown can be regarded as one of the worst forms of fear. In politics, politicians are always skeptical of what their fate might be during the election because of the unstable nature of politics. Entrepreneurs and business managers are always afraid of how their products might be accepted in the market. Leaders sometimes are afraid of how their decision might affect the company, students are afraid if they’ll pass their exams, pregnant women always experience anxiety and some element of fear about their unborn child. Parents have fears about their children safety and also how they’ll turn up to be responsible citizens. Some travelers are always afraid of flying in the air, by road or sea. While some have a phobia for traveling. The list is just endless.
Fear has limited many people from reaching their potentials. Fear can be likened to taking a risk. It’s often said that great achievers are risk-takers. These sets of individuals look at their circumstances and dare to succeed. They are not deterred by what they are experiencing, rather, they are concerned they are where they are going. These are the people that are called visionaries because they conquered their fear. It’s instructive to note that the fear of taking risk is risk itself.
Let’s discuss how we can face our fears.
Nothing is permanent. Just like life has its own up and down, fear itself is only temporary if we allow it to have to its position. Regret is what lasts forever; but the unfortunate thing is that sometimes, we all allow fear to last for a long period of time. Fear will respect you if you position it where it is supposed to be. But if you allow it to conquer you, you’ll forever regret it and that’s one the saddest you want to regret in your life.
You have the control of your life, nothing even your parents, friends, employers, spouse, and whatever you may have in your life can control you only if you allow it to control you because you know what is good for you. I will share a personal experience with you, I once quit a job I had due to the interest and vision I had. To a lot of people, it was an irrational and senseless decision because there was little or no backup plan. In reality, I had the fear of the unknown. To be honest, my only and greatest confidence was that I was going to see my grandmother to seek her blessings for my life. I remembered speaking to my mentor before quitting the job, and he asked me if my mind was at peace when I was quitting the job, I said yes, and he replied, that’s all that mattered. Fast forward the journey to two years time, I got two rare blessings that changed the course of my life (married a rare gem which my grandmother prayed for before leaving this sinful world and securing a priceless opportunity from a major financial institution which ordinarily, wouldn’t have occurred if not for the transient period of set back when I quit the job). The two lessons learned here are: Don’t try to be fearless, just don’t allow your fear to make decisions for you, and, always have peace of mind whenever you are about to make a decision.
It is important to note that a little bit of fear is normal. In fact, fear helps you to instinctively protect yourself from harm. For example, if you have fear of failing exams, you’ll be inspired to work hard harder. Also if you look at the people who want to see you fail, you’ll be inspired to work harder and humble them with your success.
How to over overcome Fear
Be engaged:
You can challenge your fear by engaging it in it. For instance, if you are afraid of public speaking, the only way you can overcome it, is by engaging in public speaking. Your fear of public speaking might prevent you from advancing in your career and that can be frustrating. So challenge that fear by facing it squarely. You can start small by speaking to family members, friends who you are comfortable with or even friendly associations or communities. You can also have an internal conversation with yourself about what your fears are stopping you from doing, and consider if it’s a problem that you need to confront.
Evaluate Risk Level
Every risk has to ascertained to know if it is worth undertaking. Keep in mind that just because something feels scary, doesn’t mean it’s actually risky. Educate yourself about the facts and the risks you actually face by doing the things that scare you.
Create an Action Plan
The key to facing your fears is to take one small step at a time. Going too fast or doing something too scary before you are ready can backfire. This basically means you have to be prepared for any opportunity you want to explore. For instance, if you are about to quit your job, it’s imperatively important for you to get sufficient experience, information, knowledge, skills, and confidence to begin the next phase of your life unless you longer have peace of mind on the current job. There will be some element of fear that’s okay because a moderate amount of anxiety is good and it’s important to keep moving forward. Moral: Don’t wait to take a step forward until your anxiety disappears. According to some school of thought, social parlance, never wait for the coast to clear before you move. Sometimes it’s good to swing through the wave.
Another way of creating an action plan is preparing before execution. If you want to develop your public speaking skills, you can eliminate fear by standing in front of a mirror and give a two-minute talk, record yourself giving a talk and watch it back, practice the talk in front of a spouse, family member, friend, and friends. You can also watch videos.
Seek Professional Help
Having mentors, experts, or even friends can play a significant role in eliminating fear from your life. If you have a specific phobia, you may not be able to conquer your fears on your own. If your fears are debilitating, or you aren’t having much success facing them on your own, seek help from tested and trusted persons. Treatment may involve talking about the thing that scares you, practicing relaxation strategies, and managing your anxiety as you face your fears head-on. A therapist, however, will help you go at a pace that is comfortable and healthy for you. It is always better to know whose hand you are holding physically or emotionally. This helps with allaying of fears for the rest of your life..
Exercise.
Exercise has a role in eliminating fear. It can refocus you (your mind can only focus on one thing at a time). Whether you go on a short walk, running, jogging, etc it will help you to be comfortable. You can also use humor to deflate your worst fears. This is mostly applicable in public speaking. Isn’t it true that when you joke about something, it can help to reduce tension and anxiety?
Don’t Be a Victim of Fearing Fear Itself
You are what you feel and it is only a matter of time for what you feel to manifest. If you have fear, don’t show it, rather show the courage in your eyes. Nothing has power over us except the one we give it. So if you give fear power, it will overpower you and resonate in all parts of your body.
Assume the Worst
A good way to overcome fear is by preparing for the best and expecting the worst. When you get to a stage in life that you don’t care about what people say about you, you have literally reached a high level of freedom. Even at work, once you make your boss understand you don’t really care if you fired why doing your legitimate assigned work to the best of your ability, he or she might respect you the more internally especially when you know your job very well as opposed to showing him/her fear by playing to the gallery. When you showy boss an element of fear, he/she might be tempted to take you for a ride because your life literally depends on the job, that’s why it’s not always good to show your fear.
You Are Not Defined by Your Fear
We are not defined by our circumstances, rather we are defined by what we overcome. Many people have faced so many challenges, but they were able to overcome with uncommon strength. The only positive thing fear does to you is that it gives you positive exposure if you learn from it. Fear is false evidence appearing real, it’s up you to face it and overcome it.
In conclusion, what are you afraid of? It’s hight you overcame and succeed.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com
Dear Destiny Friends,
Every human being loves to get approval, either for the great work they have done or the ones they are doing. They love to be appreciated and admired. They also love to be given attention when they have something valuable to say or do. In all of these, one thing is certain, there is something special about us, and this special thing makes one unique, and ultimately attracts people to us.
Let’s face it, nobody will admire you, appreciate you, approve you and give you attention if you don’t have anything to offer. The reason most people associate with someone is because they feel or know there’s something they can gain from the person. It’s hard for someone to relate closely with someone who they don’t see potential value in.
There is no doubt each and everyone of us is unique, yes, there’s something unique about you. You can sing, you can write, you can dance, you can lead, you can serve, you can cook, etc. One can even be a good actor, athlete, comedian, or preacher. The list is literally endless. Now, what’s unique about you?
When you discover what’s unique about you, please do all within your reach to nurture and develop it. One day, the right person, who truly appreciates and knows your value will celebrate you.
I have a friend who is exceptionally skilled in writing and developing creative contents. I call him a genius because he can literally write a book within a week. How he does it is what I don’t understand. I was surprised when he once told me he wrote a book and manuscript in one week. According to him, he has been developing the contents mentally, but hasn’t found time to put his thoughts together, and when he finally gets his thoughts together, he was able to write the book and manuscript. This is a typical way of knowing a unique being.
Many, however, do not know what’s unique about them. We focus our energy chasing what is not chasing us instead of focusing on developing what we already have. It’s sad to see young and old people living their lives in an unintentional manner with a belief that somehow lines, favour or opportunities will fall in place for them.
Sometimes, we rely on other people’s affirmation and opinion, and accept it as our fate. For instance, just because one is tall, he might be told he will be a great fit for basketball without considering if the athlete loves basketball; again, just because someone is very intelligent, his parents will encourage him to major in a particular discipline, which is perceived as lucrative without considering if the person likes it pr not.
I once experienced this fate when my late dad inspired me to study taxation law in New York Law School, a major I detest with passion. It was like a suicidal mission for me because I do know, it will take miracle to graduate from the program. How I was able to get a scholarship for my grades and graduate in record time is a story for another day. I’m not wired as a finance person, I will better serve humanity in the social and developmental space where my skills, talents, gift and passion will be better utilized. And ever since I joined the space, I have seen results.
There are many cases where many people lose their identities without knowing they are unique. We are all unique in our individual ways. Just like there are several gifts and talents, we have different skills. When you know what’s unique about you, you will stand out and the world will not only appreciate you, but will celebrate you.
When one discovers the power of their uniqueness, we will gather strength to unleash it to the world. Uniqueness works in several ways. For instance, the mere fact that ten people are genius, talented, skillful or valuable in a particular work, the person with the unique gift is the person who will not only stand out, but will be called upon to do the work.
Let me share more insight. If ten people sing a particular song with a great voice, the person who is called to be a singer will receive a unique appreciation because he/she is working on purpose. That is why it is easy to see a lot of people venturing into a particular form of business, but the favour of the business will not locate them because they are not uniquely destined to do business.
Few years ago, one of my mentors shared a deep insight with me. He said that, as a trained medical doctor, he once observed that despite the fact there are hundreds and thousands of medical doctors practicing their profession. One fateful day, he noticed a particular patient was not responding to treatment despite all the medication that had been given to him by a nurse, his health was deteriorating, then another nurse came and administered the same pill a nurse gave the patient, and the patient began to feel better. What does that tell you? The second nurse was probably working in her purpose which aligns with her profession, and as such the corresponding success. This goes to show that when one is unique, it has a way of robbing off on their work.
Furthermore, he stated that Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, and Beyonce are some of the gifted singers and dancers the world has ever celebrated. He went on to say that we have hundreds and thousands of musicians, but only a few have got the spotlight.
What does that tell you? When you are unique, the world will celebrate you. I have understood that the fastest way to get recognition in life is to work in areas where one’s strength and unique gift will better serve the purpose. This is simply because the world does not celebrate one’s weakness, rather, the world celebrates one’s strength.
In recent times, I have seen myself as a counselor and human inspiration. My counseling skills have enabled me to influence people to live positive lives. Overtime, I have realized that when people share their burden with me, they feel relieved after speaking with me. What amazes me most is the fact that even my elders feel comfortable to relate with me on a cordial basis. Maybe, I have a unique gift for counseling and educating.
Today, I am going to charge you to focus your energy and time on whatever will bring you the highest satisfaction. Even if you are looking for a job, applying for school, or seeking any opportunity, your focus should be centered on what you have that the job, school or opportunity will amplify. When you do so, you will be in high demand.
In conclusion, please affirm to yourself today, I am a unique being with a unique personality, purpose and gift.
Say to yourself, ‘I am original’, and refuse to be fake.
Again confess that your originality, authenticity and uniqueness will attract favours, blessings, opportunities from leaders and queens to you, and you will be celebrated.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
The Federal Road Safety Corps (FRSC) has emerged as the Best Road Safety Agency in Africa. This monumental achievement corroborates the Corps’ almost four decades of dedication, resilience and passion towards safeguarding lives on Nigerian roads.
The Corps, according to a statement made available to the National Association of Online Security News Publishers (NAOSNP), received the award at the 3rd edition of the Kofi Annan Road Safety Award held in Elzuwini in the Kingdom of Eswatini, South Africa between 14th and 15th of April 2025.
You may recall that Kofi Annan Road Safety Award was initiated by the Office of the United Nations Secretary General’s Special Envoy on Road Safety in collaboration with Kofi Annan Foundation to immortalize the contributions of African illustrious son Kofi Annan who served as the Secretary General of the United Nations.
The prestigious Road Safety Management Award represents a badge of honour for Nigeria, and a pure testament of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s commitment to unflinching support for the Federal Road Safety Corps and his believe in the Corps’ potential to serve as a model for other African nations. Indeed, FRSC’s tireless efforts to reduce road crashes and promote safe driving practices have paid off, earning recognition across the continent.
The recognition further speaks volume, as well as justifies the giant strides Nigeria has made in ensuring safety of road users and her leadership role in the Sub-region.
Reacting to the recognition, the Corps Marshal, Shehu Mohammed said that it is a testament to FRSC’s unrelenting passion for road safety. He thanked the entire community of the motoring public, stakeholders, partners, and the Nigerian people for their support. Emphasising that together, the Corps was able to achieve the enviable feat because of the collective energy and all round support received from the motoring public.
The Corps Marshal also revealed that FRSC’s winning formula includes, innovative strategies, implementing cutting-edge road safety initiatives that drive results, collaboration, fostering partnerships with stakeholders to promote road safety awareness, community engagement, educating the public on safe driving practices, full deployment of technology and road safety protocols.
The award was received on behalf of the Corps and the Federal Republic of Nigeria by the Principal Staff Officer to the Corps Marshal ACM Meshach Adigizi Jatau.
A Chief Magistrate in the Rivers State Judiciary, Mr. Ejike George, has resigned his appointment.
He hinged his decision on the unease over the appointment of a Sole Administrator to oversee the affairs of the State.
His resignation was contained in a letter dated April 11, 2025, and addressed to the Honourable Chief Judge of Rivers State through the Secretary of the Rivers State Judicial Service Commission.
The letter was titled “Voluntary Retirement From Service.”
George, who disclosed that he had put in 16 years in the judiciary, said the appointment of a Sole Administrator is tantamount to a “quasi-military administration.”
He expressed dismay over the direction of the governance of the State, which he said is “alien” and “antithetical” to the values of the legal profession.
The statement read: “This present is intended to convey my decision to voluntarily retire my appointment as Magistrate of the Judiciary of Rivers State.
“This difficult and regrettable decision is informed largely by my discomfort with the recent appointment of a quasi-military administration to run the affairs of a modern state like ours.
“Milord will agree with me that this type of governance system is not only alien but also runs antithetical to our hallowed profession as legal practitioners and adjudicators.
“Having put in a whopping 16 (sixteen) out of my 22 (twenty-two) years of legal practice into this Judiciary as Magistrate under successive democratic administrations, I find it difficult to work with the current setting, as doing so would amount to a tacit and naive acquiescence.
“Thanks Milord, for the opportunity to serve.”
