News
Food for Living: Spirituality and Success
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
Let me begin this article with a disclosure; I’m not an ordained Minister of God. I am a trained Human Capacity coach. I therefore, speak and write on whatever affects the optimum performance of human beings. One may be wondering why I decided to write about the spirituality of success. Before you conclude, just spare me a minute and you will see reasons you need to pay attention to this wonderful article.
Did you know that all success is spiritual?
Here is the reason. Before anything happens physically, it has taken shape spiritually. This is because success starts from the mind. Is that not spiritual? Before a blogger publishes an article on a website, he or she would have done some background work before the article is published. That’s spiritual success. Before a politician wins an election, he/she must have campaigned; before a student passes an exam, wins a scholarship or an award, he/she must have distinguished himself and herself; before someone gets an appointment, he/she must have developed himself/herself. These are all examples of spiritual success.
To show you how spiritual success works, the work must be done in the closet before it gets public attention. That’s why it’s always said, you must work hard in success and allow your success to make the noise.
Let’s spend a minute on sacrifice. Sacrifice comes in several ways. You must know the kind of sacrifice you want to engage in. As a progressive being, you must be intentional the way you live your life. You must know what you want in life. This entails knowing who you want as a life partner, business partner, the kind of business you would like to engage in, the kind of friend, mentor, parent, child you would love to have. When you have been able to decide on these salient issues, you will know the kind of sacrifice you will have to engage in to get what you want.
As a student, the sacrifice you engage in to pass your exams is different from the sacrifice an entrepreneur will engage in to grow his/her business. The same is applicable to a parent who wants to give his children a decent education. As a mentee, you must know the kind of person you would like to adopt as a mentor, and then know what works for the person and see how you can use your gift, value or time to get the attention of the person. As a man interested in a lady, you must sacrifice your time and resources to get her attention. These are all spiritual sacrifices because you must have done the work before the result comes out.
Did you know that sacrifice can make things happen? There’s a level of sacrifice you will engage in, that can provoke someone to do what they never intended to do. In the corporate world, you will get promoted by the extra work they do.
Sacrifice can be spiritual, occultic or covenanted. Sacrifice can be given to a god/God, it can also be given to a human being. The question you need to ask yourself is who am I you sacrificing to and for what purpose? This is because every sacrifice has a goal and purpose.
Your sacrifice shows how serious, passionate, and intentional you are in getting what you want. I have personally sacrificed a lot to get to where I am today. I invest my time and resources in causes I am passionate about. I invest in my mentors, mentees, business, late parents, family, and friends just to mention a few.
The right sacrifice can open doors of opportunities for you. It’s sad to note that many people don’t know how to offer the right sacrifice. Do you know where your prayers, academics, works and connections cannot reach? Did you know that your sacrifice can speak for you? Your sacrifice can serve as a communication link for you.
It’s also sad to note that most people sacrifice with vested interest. If you sacrifice your money and time due to an interest you have in somebody, it’s only a matter of time for the true intention of the person to be known. Your sacrifice must come from your heart.
The level of sacrifice you engage in determines the kind of result you will get. When most people sleep late at night doing productive work and waking up quite early like an early worm to do some productive work, they don’t do it because it’s fun. They do it because they have a project they are working on. It’s sad to note that many people don’t know how to sacrifice for the right cause. They misplace the time and money they are supposed to use for a worthy cause for an unworthy cause, thereby spending major time on minor things and spend minor time on major things.
According to a veteran celebrity journalist Dr. Dele Momodu, ‘many people are chasing what they should have left for God and ignore what should lead them to God’. If you know what you want in life, no amount of sacrifice is too much to attain it. It’s instructive to note that people become successful by virtue of the work they do based on the sacrifice they have invested with the work they do.
In conclusion, if you want to go far in life, you must sacrifice something. If you want anything in life, you must sacrifice.
Question: what are you using as an exchange for your sacrifice?
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer Design Your Destiny and Unleash Your Destiny. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
The FCT Police Command says it has arrested the lawmaker representing Aba North and South Federal Constituency of Abia State in the House of Representatives, Hon. Alexander Ikwechegh for allegedly assaulting a Bolt driver identified as Mr. Stephen Abuwatseya and making derogatory comment on the office of the Inspector General of Police.
A statement on Monday by the Spokesperson of the FCT Police Command, SP Josephine Adeh said the Command received a report at the Maitama Divisional Headquarters regarding an incident involving Mr. Abuwatseya and Hon. Alexander Ikwechegh.
“Preliminary investigations indicate that Mr. Abuwatseya was delivering a package to Hon. Ikwegh when a dispute arose concerning the method of delivery. During this altercation, Mr. Abuwatseya was reportedly physically assaulted.
“The FCT Police Command expresses grave concern over Hon. Ikwechegh’s dismissive attitude toward the office of the Inspector General of Police following the incident.
“After allegedly slapping the victim, he reportedly remarked with contempt, “You can go ahead and call the Inspector General of Police,” demonstrating a troubling disregard for the authority of law enforcement.
“Currently, the suspect is at the Maitama Police Station undergoing questioning,” the FCT police image maker said.
She added that the FCT Commissioner of Police, CP Olatunji Disu has mandated a thorough investigation into the matter while assuring of the Command’s commitment to conducting an impartial investigation and ensuring justice in all cases.
Police said appropriate legal action will be taken upon completion of the investigation.
The Zone 2 Command Headquarters under the leadership of AIG Adegoke M. Fayoade, has held a lecture on measuring gender-related killings of women and girls (femicides), with a view to presenting recommendations for data systems improvement, advocacy and Action.
The lecture, which was held at the MD Abubakar Conference Hall, Zone 2 Command Headquarters, Onikan, Lagos, was was presided over by AIG Fayoade with senior personnel in attendance.
The presentation, according to a statement by the Zone’s Public Relations Officer, SP Ayuba Ummah, and made available to the National Association of Online Security News Publishers (NAOSNP), was an awareness and training programme, which aims at closing the statistical gap and establish a framework for measuring femicides within the Nigeria Police Force and relevant stakeholders to enhance policy making in ending this brutal manifestation of Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG) as well as provide a comparable data for global reference.
During the lecture, the Force Pathologist, ACP (Dr.) Samuel Keshinro, spoke on “Measuring Gender-related Killing of Women and Girls (femicides) in Lagos State to Present Recommendations for Data Systems Improvements, Advocacy and Action” focusing on the importance of data collection to assess the burden of femicide according to the framework of the International Classification of Crime for Statistical Purposes (ICCS). The ICCS is a classification of criminal offences developed by the UN based on internationally agreed concepts, definitions and principles to enhance the consistency and international comparability of crime statistics and improve analytical capabilities at both the national and international levels.
At the presentation, Dr Keshinro cited the Spotlight Initiative (the United Nations high-impact initiative to end violence against women and girls) on VAWG stating that one in three women experience sexual, physical, and psychological abuse including victims of trafficking, or violent social norms. The pervasiveness of VAWG which is a subset of GBV that specifically targets females are perpetrated by intimate partners i.e. Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) which includes husbands, boyfriend, ex-husband and ex-boyfriends causing sexual, physical, and psychological harm to the female gender. The extreme form of VAWG that causes death is called FEMICIDE defined by the UN as the intentional killing of a woman or a girl with a gender-related motivation.
Dear Destiny Friends,
The best helping hand you will ever find is at the end of your own arm – John Mason
One of the best forms of love, if not the best, is self-love. The ultimate truth is that apart from the creator, nobody can love you more than you can love yourself.
As human beings, sometimes, we depend on other people’s love to feel loved. Some people even desire social media and online love just to be accepted into the society. No doubt, everyone loves attention and approval.
Everyone loves to be accepted, appreciated, and recognized, but some of us are not ready to do the needful to attract the desired attention. The simple truth about life is that nobody can give you attention, neither will anyone give you recognition if you have not given them a reason to do so. So, one needs to help themselves before other people can help them.
Helping yourself is the best thing that can happen to you. When you help yourself, the joy hits differently. Helping yourself is not limited to adding value to your life. Did you know that self-care is a lifestyle, and it is one of the ways to help your life. Some of the ways self-care can help your life are engaging in regular exercise, eating healthy, avoiding drugs and alcohol, and sleeping well. Self-help also involves taking care of your mental, emotional, physical, environment, recreational, financial, social, physical, and spiritual needs.
Did you know that practicing simple self-care activities can help one achieve greater mental clarity, and gain a better understanding of their feelings?
Helping oneself is okay so long as it doesn’t involve unlawful actions or breach of peace. It’s sad to see people engage in illegality just to get what they want.
Those that depend on fellow human beings for help might be disappointed. Even though they may not have the intention to fail you, life sometimes, happens. They too might be going through personal challenges. Always leave a space in your heart to forgive or overlook when supposed friends, mentors, family members, mentors and benefactors don’t come through for you.
The sad reality of life is that, most times, we like to receive from resourceful persons, but we don’t seem to ask who will give to them. Do you think manna will fall from heaven for them? No. They must find creative ways to make ends meet. One of my mentors once stated, ‘you can work alone, but you can’t eat alone’.
What you don’t know is that these resourceful people were able to help themselves. That’s why they were able to get assistance from established institutions and resourceful people. Some of them might have had a business plans which they pitched to a team of panelists. Some developed programmes, sowed seeds, traveled far and wide and made mistakes while searching for the right path. These are some ways of helping oneself.
I have always stated, we all go through a secret frustration which nobody knows. For a fact, it is easier for people to assist you when you have added adequate value to your life. When you do, people won’t see you as a liability, rather, they will see you as a resource being.
In my journey towards life, I have realized that when you have a mentor or leader you respect, your ability to do the work will enable them to put the icing on the cake. I vividly remember when I published my first book, I had to reach out to Dr. Chief Dele Momodu to write the Foreword to my book. He was kind enough to accept my request. Imagine, if I had not written the book, the opportunity wouldn’t have arisen.
Now, you see that I was able to help myself before help came through. Isn’t it true that heaven helps those who help themselves.
In contemporary times, sometimes, we hope and rely on family members, friends, mentors, associates, mentees, benefactors and more, to help our craft just because we feel and think they are in a better position to assist us, depending on their position or status, but the reality is that sometimes we ask people things that are beyond them and when they refuse to assist, we feel offended.
One of my mentors, Dr. Yomi Garnett, rightly stated as follows, “So your aunt won’t help you financially. Your well-connected uncle won’t give you an introductory note to his minister-friend. Refuse to despise or resent them. Forgive them. Make excuses for them, such as they have enough challenges of their own. Then promptly take responsibility for your own life and your own success by asking God to show you His way.”
I can relate to Dr. Garnett’s statement because, in the past, I have tried to reach some people, some I shared my programmes for consideration, while others came via introduction. In most of these engagements, I couldn’t get what I wanted either because I didn’t come prepared, or was yet to develop the required capacity and competence to execute the task. However, when I developed expertise, they came for me, and in some cases, I was highly recommended. This is the reality of life; people generally love ripe fruits as opposed to unripe fruits which don’t taste nice.
During my formative years, I depended on people to the extent I feel entitled for their support because I felt they were rich, wealthy, and highly connected. I didn’t realize life doesn’t work that way. It was much later in life I realized that it will be easier for them to share their network and net worth with me when I have helped myself. As a matter of fact, that has become my fate because I have had opportunities to relate and work closely with some of my benefactors.
Today, I charge you to make an intentional effort to help yourself. Give your life a meaning. Stop complaining and start to take action to change the course of your life. You are not alone in this struggle; we are all in it together. Remember, nobody can write your story more than you and if you don’t talk about yourself, nobody will talk about you.
In conclusion, endeavor to help yourself so others can help you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
