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Food for Living: Benefits of Failing

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By Henry Ukazu

Greetings Destiny Friends,

There is nothing that pleases someone more than success, and there’s nothing that humbles one more than failure. You may be wondering if there is anything more painful than failure. Yes, regret will cause more pain than failure. Failure will give you ways to succeed. Regret will give you compounding regrets. The fear of failure often stems from a fear of experiencing shame or embarrassment.

In the journey of life, we all strive to succeed, but when our wishes, aspirations, desires, and hard work don’t pay off, we tend to feel disappointed. But what we fail to understand is that failure can be a blessing in disguise. There’s no doubt, failure can make you feel demoralized, helpless, hopeless, and anxious (both consciously and unconsciously) but you can always fight back.

Each of us have experienced failure in one way or another. Sometimes when we fail, we feel the world is conspiring against us. The moment that you realize that failure is not limited to you; you can motivate yourself to get up faster.

Failure means different things to different people. You can fail in business, marriage, academics, entertainment, personally or professionally. Failure can also mean a first attempt in learning. Failure is like a relationship. It is heartbreaking When there’s a heart break; it takes time to heal, both emotionally and otherwise. Getting over a failed relationship is heartbreaking.

Failure comes in different shapes and sizes. According to Edmondson, there are three kinds of failure

·         Preventable failure: a failure caused by deviating from a known process.

·         Complex failure: a failure caused by a system breakdown.

·         Intelligent failure: a failure caused by an unsuccessful trial.

The process of success is normally associated with first trial, then failure before you eventually succeed. One of the major causes of failure is lack of preparation and perseverance.

That you failed doesn’t mean you are a failure, it simply means you have not done what you are supposed to do, or you are missing something. Most of the great men and women that have succeeded are ‘great failures’. They failed many times before they succeeded.

You can’t let your failures define you. A major mistake most people make in life is that they easily give up at the first or second attempt, some other people let failures define them, but, you don’t have to let your mistakes define you. According to former American President, Barack Obama, “You have to let your failures teach you.”

Did you know that there are many lessons we can learn from failure? For instance, your mistakes can help push your boundaries. Mistakes are necessary for our success, if you are not making any mistakes, that simply means you are not doing anything interesting.

Again, if you’re not failing, you might be operating out of fear. Most people fail due to fear. Finally, if you’re not failing, you’re missing opportunities. The fear of failing can be a deciding factor for a progressive to take risks.

Again, President Obama noted that being successful is hard. You won’t necessarily succeed at everything the first time you try. Some of the most successful people in the world are the ones who’ve had the most failures. Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team, and he lost hundreds of games and missed thousands of shots during his career. But he once said, “I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” No one’s born being good at things, you become good at things through hard work. You don’t hit every note the first time you sing a song. You’ve got to practice”.

According to Brian Tracy, failure is a prerequisite for great success, if you want to succeed, double your rate of failure. You must come to terms that there is no success without failure. Most of the successful people in the world are the ones who have had the most failure. J. k Rowling who wrote Harry Potter, her first book was rejected 12 times because it was published. These people succeeded because they understood that you can’t let failure define you.

Failure comes in several stages, first it comes in the form of shock and surprise, then denial, anger and blame, depression, acceptance and then insight and change. To overcome failure, I will be sharing tips you can adopt. The first step in handling failure is knowing the true cause of a failure and how to overcome it. The second stage is by admitting the mistake. Failure does not mean your life is going to be over. You can learn from failure and be constructive. Whenever you fail, find inspiration and don’t give up. Be passionate about your cause and vision and surround yourself with positive people.

The best thing that you can do each time you fail is to learn from your mistakes. If you screwed up, don’t let that be your excuse to give up. Let your screw up be your motivation to try once again, and this time without making the same mistake.

Create a positive mindset:

Very few people understand the power of the mind. When you fail you need to make a conscious decision to be positive rather than miserable. If you do choose to be miserable, it will be much harder to get back up from your failure. However, if you cultivate a positive mindset, then you can move on from each failure without losing your enthusiasm and drive. If you do choose to be miserable, it will be much harder to get back up from your failure. However, if you cultivate a positive mindset, then you can move on from each failure without losing your enthusiasm and drive.

Tap Into Your Mentor(s)

Whenever you fail, get inspired by your mentors. We all have mentors, whether they are athletes, inventors, academics, entrepreneurs, artists, musicians, actors, politicians (joking), humanitarians, or authors. These people have been in the same position as us, and they can serve as a great inspiration during the tough times. So, when you are in the midst of failure; read about them, listen to them, and watch them. Find out what they did to overcome their hardships and apply that to your situation.

Celebrate little wins

Whenever you fail, before you judge yourself, write a list of your success. Sometimes we feel we are worthless when we fail. To combat this feeling, you need to write down a list of all the times that you succeeded.

In conclusion, Failure is rough, tough, and painful; however, it goes hand in hand with success. The way you handle your failure will determine if you succeed, and the tips above should help you cope with failure when it comes your way.

Here are a few quotes to keep you inspired if you feel like giving up.

“If I’ve learned one lesson from all that’s happened to me, it’s that there’s no such thing as the biggest mistake of your existence. There’s no such thing as ruining your life. Life’s a pretty resilient thing, it turns out.” -Sophie Kinsella

“You don’t drown by falling in the water, you drown by staying there.” -Robert Jordan

“It’s failure that gives you the proper perspective on success.” – Ellen DeGeneres

“Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” – Denis Waitley

“The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing.” – Henry Ford

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” – Thomas A. Edison

“Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all.” -Dale Carnegie

“I am not judged by the number of times I fail, but by the number of times I succeed: and the number of times I succeed is in direct proportion to the number of times I fail and keep trying.” -Tom Hopkins

“Do not ignore your failures, acknowledge them and use them to motivate you.
When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” -Joseph Kennedy

Henry Ukazu writes from New New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success

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Glo Celebrates Muslim Faithful on Eid-El-Kabir

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Telecommunications service provider, Globacom, has rejoiced with Muslims all over Nigeria on the celebration of the 2024 Eid-El-Kabir.

In a message of goodwill released in Lagos on Saturday, the company asked the Muslim community to take advantage of the occasion and offer prayers for the nation’s prosperity, unity, and well-being.

The company noted in the statement: “We felicitate with the Muslim Ummah in Nigeria as they celebrate the Eid-El-Kabir festival. We call on them to use the occasion to continue to live up to the tenets of their faith through acts of charity, peaceful co-existence with their neighbours and obedience to the injunctions of the Holy Quran”.

Globacom congratulated Muslims who completed the Hajj this year as part of the Islamic injunctions. It also urged Muslims to emulate the commitment, dedication, and obedience exhibited by Prophet Ibraheem, who demonstrated these qualities by offering his son as a sacrifice to Allah, a move that is commemorated on Eid-El-Kabir.

“It is a season of charity, peacemaking and forgiveness. We must remember to cater for the poor and the needy in line with Allah’s injunction to be our brother’s keeper”, Globacom also noted.

The company sent its best wishes for a joyful Eid-El-Kabir to all Muslims who observe the festival. It also guaranteed its subscribers a seamless communications experience by offering top-notch services during the festival and beyond.

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Inter-Agency Collaboration: FRSC Corps Marshal Visits CDS Musa

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The Corps Marshal, Federal Road Safety Corps (FRSC), Shehu Mohammed, has paid an official visit to the Chief of Defence Staff, General Christopher Musa, to consolidate existing relationship between the Corps and the nation’s Defence Arms, seek areas of fruitful partnership and achieve considerable mileage in Inter-agency collaborations.

According to a statement signed by the Public Education Officer, Corps Commander Olusegun Ogungbemide, and made available to the National Association of Online Security News Publishers (NAOSNP), during the visit, the Corps Marshal commended the Defence Chief for his leadership qualities and the successes achieved in maintaining national security. He also sought collaboration in the area of human capital development which he believes will help advance the course safety on the nation’s highways.

He intimated the Chief of Defence Staff of the role of the Federal Road Safety Corps in improving national security through intelligence gathering, noting that FRSC is a custodian of critical national infrastructure; the National Vehicle Identification Scheme,a database that has helped in the fight against insecurity in the country.

Reacting, the Chief of Defence Staff congratulated the Corps Marshal on his appointment, emphasizing the critical role the Corps plays in advancing national security. He assured the Corps Marshal of the readiness of his office to assist the Corps in the area of personnel training as well as other veritable areas of interest.

He highlighted the critical role the Corps plays in the fight against insecurity being the Security agency that have greater level of interface with the general public.
He applauded the energy, resilience and steadfastness of FRSC personnel who against all odds are out in their best to make the highways safe.

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Food for Living: Become a Person of Value

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By Henry Ukazu

Dear Destiny Friend,

“Try not to become a person of success but rather try to become a person of value” – Albert Einstein

To be valuable is one of the best things that can happen to any person. Whoever has value is the king of the pack, and is well sought after. He is resourceful, and everyone wants to tap into his resourcefulness.

But what does it mean to be a person of value? Note that understanding differs when the word value is mentioned. Value is relative because what’s valuable to one person might not be valuable to another. For example, a lady who has several suitors seeking her hand in marriage has something of interest she admires and dislikes in every suitor, but what will determine who she will marry will be the value she desires in a man. This value might be money, character, academics, loyalty, beauty or skill.

It’s however, sad, when people think that value relates to only money; but value is more than money. It can be skills, academic qualifications or certification, network and networth, spiritual life, social life, physical strength, position, talent among others.

To the world, value means having something to offer; a person’s value is something that can make a positive difference in the lives of others. When one is valuable, it means that they are not just a consumer, but a producer and creator. It means that they are not just followers, but a leaders.

The importance of value cannot be overemphasized. Everyone has a measure of value, but the challenge most people face is the inability to maximize their value.

Your value is a gift to the world. Your value is your talent. People of value are in high demand. People of exceptional value are in higher demand, and are respected and honoured.

Did you know that your value can be used to know your interest? For instance, how you spend your time; what you think; how you invest and spend your money; where you work; causes you support; choice of majors; the books you read; the events you attend and more, all combine to reflect your inherent value. Your value will assist you to know how you can balance work life and career. Your value can be used to showcase your mission and passion for life.

It’s instructive to note that nobody will willingly come to you if you don’t have value. When you position yourself as a pest, beggar, liability, etc., people will begin to see you in that light. Just to let you know how attractive one can be, imagine an ant being attracted to sugar. It is simply because the sugar has what the ant likes. That’s how life works. People will come to you when they see you have what they have.  That simply tells you must add value to yourself. Quit complaining and apportioning blame to people, government and circumstance, take ownership and responsibility of your life.  According to – Marcus T Cicero “You will be of as much value to others as you have been to yourself.”

When you know the value you offer, you won’t need to talk too much. You will have self confidence, you won’t need to announce yourself, rather, people will seek your services or product. According to  Patrick Lencioni, the author of “The Five Dysfunctions of a Team, “he stated the five ways to become a person of value and Influence. According to him, you must find your passion and purpose; Embrace Personal Development, choose a problem you can solve; be authentic.

1. Find your purpose and passion

The great and influential men and women the world has ever known were those who discovered and pursued their purpose and were driven by their passions. When you’re on the path of purpose, it’s easier to add significant value to the lives of others. You’ll hardly be of any significant value to people or influence them when you don’t know where you are going yourself. Purpose ignites passion which keeps you motivated, inspired and focused. You need that to be valuable and influential.

2. Embrace personal development

Becoming a person of value and influence demands embracing a lifelong pursuit of personal development. Personal development is a process of understanding and developing yourself to realize your full potential. The extent to which you’re able to add value and influence others depends on the extent to which you have been able to develop yourself. Every raw material has little or no value. It becomes valuable after it’s been refined. Take time to refine yourself in every area. That could be hard but it’s rewarding. Daily ask yourself, “What do I need to learn or do to become a better person?

3. Choose a problem you can solve for people

To be a person of value and influence, you have to become genuinely interested in people enough to solve a specific problem for them. Think of what you can do to make lives better. The more people you solve problems for, the more valuable and influential you become.

4. Be original and unique

When we live our lives mimicking or imitating others, it steals our originality. Originality is the beauty of life. Guess what? Imitations don’t get much attention, originals do.  You can copy my style, but you can’t imitate my creativity. We’ve all heard that when you imitate someone else, the best you can be is second best. That’s very true. To be a person of influence, don’t be anyone else. Be you.

5. Pursue excellence

Becoming a person of value and influence is not going to be so much about what you do as it is about how well you do it. It’s said that whatever is worth doing is worth doing well. Go beyond the usual. Add a touch of class in all you do. That’s what excellence is all about. Mind you it’s not the same as perfection.

6. Encourage and inspire others

Find a way to encourage and inspire others to be all they can be. Empower, share your knowledge and skills with others. Your value and influence is connected to the number of lives that are better because of you.

7. Exude confidence

Self-confidence is one quality that’s very admirable. It’s about knowing what you want and having the courage and boldness to go for it. When you’re self-confident, people are attracted to you. When you don’t have it, the opposite is the case. The reason is simple — what value do you think a person who doesn’t believe in himself offers?

8. Have integrity

It’s true that none of us is perfect but for you to be a person of value and influence you must be able to earn people’s confidence and trust. You should be able to live by certain values that uphold sound moral principles. Integrity means always doing the right thing and, in all circumstances, whether or not it’s convenient. It’s about being sincere and real. It’s about being honest enough to admit when you’re wrong. It’s your “yes” as “yes” and your “no” as “no”. It’s people trusting you not for any other reason but because you have earned their trust.

In conclusion, to be relevant consider being a person of value. Remember, your value depends on what you can offer.

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