Metro
Food for Living: Choose Your Name Wisely
- Share
- Tweet /home/rhoncare/pointblank.ng/wp-content/plugins/mvp-social-buttons/mvp-social-buttons.php on line 69
https://pointblank.ng/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/download.jpeg&description=Food for Living: Choose Your Name Wisely', 'pinterestShare', 'width=750,height=350'); return false;" title="Pin This Post">
By Henry Ukazu
Greetings Dear Friends,
We all have names which our parents, godfather/mother, or even good relatives and friends gave to us at birth, and we always like to be addressed rightly and with respect before we respond. Just to let you know how powerful your name can be, if you are called a name that is not yours, there’s every tendency you won’t respond, nor matter how nice it may sound. Even if you are called the right name but with the wrong pronunciation, you might also feel slighted to respond, and even if you respond, you’ll react in a way as to offer correction. This is because names are very symbolic, and according to the platinum rule, people are treated the way they wish to be addressed.
Names are very powerful and they have deep meanings, and as a result, must be chosen wisely. Names are regarded as trademarks/logos and come in different shapes and sizes. Some people even have nicknames which have defined them in different ways. Even in business; the name you choose has an impact on people’s perception, especially your potential clients. Therefore, it is imperatively and critically important for you to consider whatever name you will like to be associated with.
A name is an identity. It is a descriptor that allows people to make quick judgments and assumptions about us. When a particular name is mentioned, a lot of questions normally come to mind. We can even assume what it is likely to be. Our names and identities are regarded as the first impressions people have about us. For example, how we dress, the way we wear our hair, how we behave, and even where we go; all begin with our identity and what we call ourselves. Whether it is religion, sexuality or gender, it is part of an identity that can influence how you present yourself to the world, and how you interact with the world. Depending on the situation and circumstance, what we call ourselves may change. That is why it is important for you to consider the name, group or network you are associated with.
The big question we have to answer is what name do I respond to? As human beings, some of us are very sensitive, some are conservative while others tend to have a liberal attitude towards life. Depending on which category you belong to, you can decide to be the game-changer in whatever situation you are into. You may have been called a dull person, lazy being, slow, ugly, fat, etc., but how you respond is actually what makes the ultimate difference. As you may know, life is not what happens to you, but how you react to it. It should be noted that you can’t stop people calling you negative names, but you can decide to choose what you answer to. As a an advice, don’t answer names you are called, when they call you hello depressed, short, unattractive, unqualified, sick, orphan, just calmly respond, ‘sorry there’s no one by that name around here, I guess you may have gotten the wrong address’. In a rhetoric way, you can also respond, do you mean positive, tall, smart, healthy, blessed, beautiful, handsome, extraordinary, talented, skillful, etc.
Studies suggest that liking your own name is predictive of well-being and happiness, and it also positively affects your self-esteem. But does your name affect how other people treat you? According to Dale Carnegie.
“A person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language.” Why then is it so important to call people their true names? A person’s name is the greatest connection to their own identity and individuality. Some might say it is the most important word in the world to that person. This is because it is one of the fastest and easiest ways to get someone’s attention especially when they are teased or praised.
Here are some tips on how you can use your name to influence your brand.
Make it a commitment:
Make a commitment to answer whatever uplifts and support your vision. Once you are subconsciously aware of what happens around you, do yourself a favor to international change the narrative by changing the negative news or information that surrounds you or your business. For example, you can work on your self, business, brand, organization, etc; to the extent, people will recognize you as an excellent or reliable person/brand as opposed to the different labels that bring negative vibes to you. As you may know, the world is governed by perception.
Practice:
Practicing whatever name brand you want to be associated with is a great way to bring change to not only your personal life but your business or brand. You can do this by calling yourself names of interest that appeal to you. You may be surprised to know it will come back to you. Don’t be concerned about the negative voices you may be hearing from friends or even family members, just continue to work on your craft. There have been testimonies of people who dreamt of being a governor, president, leader of an industry, etc. despite not having what it takes to be the person in the picture. They were able to act it in addition to calling themselves the names and guess what, it’s it came to pass. In one of my articles I published five years ago titled: Dreams Come True, I opined that your dreams are valid and it will come true if you work hard, believe in yourself and have the God factor around you.
Ignore the name tag:
As mentioned earlier, it is up to you to respond to whatever name you decide to answer. Names don’t matter anything unless you give it the needed power/energy it needs to feed on. Names are like dead woods, but you can activate life into it when you speak life into it. Names work with our minds, when you decide to call yourself love, love will automatically follow you.
Furthermore, Ignore the nay-sayers and give your attention to what brings you life, and when you do, the desired transformation will begin to rear up. Personally, I was called names because of my horrible writing skills, but I have been able to author a book by the special grace of God which my detractors have not been able to accomplish. The secret is simple, I never answered the negative names I was called.
Creating Opportunity:
Knowing how to relate with people is a powerful skill that is in high demand. A good personal relation skill will create opportunities for you. It’s like a charm that can disarm even the most hardened person to respond to stimuli. As popularly opined in some social parlance, if a man can make a lady to smile, he’s halfway into her heart. It is important to note that people want to be treated as human beings, not objects. Using their name is the fastest and most reliable way of building rapport and creating a good first impression. Everyone has a name — use it to better connect to them, especially if you work in the customer service position. You will notice a difference in your relationships.
In conclusion, what is your name?
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com
Metro
Benin-Agbor Road Gridlock Worsens, Motorists, Commuters, Residents Lament
The traffic gridlock along the Benin-Agbor Road has continued for days, leaving motorists, commuters and residents stranded for hours as the situation worsens.
The prolonged gridlock, which is being attributed to the deteriorated condition of the road and failed portions along the route, is disrupting commercial activities and making daily commuting increasingly difficult.
According to reports, motorists have continued to express frustration over the hours spent in traffic, saying the situation is taking a toll on their businesses, vehicles and daily activities.
One of the drivers lamented that the road has suffered years of neglect under successive governments, saying repeated calls for intervention have not produced a lasting solution.
He said the poor condition of the road, combined with the heavy volume of vehicles using the route, has made movement particularly difficult, with some motorists spending several hours on journeys that would ordinarily take a fraction of that time.
Residents along the route are also expressing concern over the impact of the gridlock, as the congestion is affecting the movement of people and goods and disrupting commercial activities in communities along the corridor.
The Chairman of Ikpoba-Okha Youth Association, Kingsley Osenmwingiewho, joined the call for urgent intervention, appealing to the Federal government to expedite repairs of the failed portions of the Benin-Asaba Road.
Osenmwingiewho particularly called for immediate attention to the Benin-Agbor Road bypass axis, where the condition of the road has become a major source of concern to motorists and residents.
He said rehabilitating the failed sections will not only ease the present gridlock but also improve the movement of people, goods and services along the busy Benin-Asaba corridor.
For motorists and residents who have continued to endure the daily traffic nightmare, the appeal is for authorities to move beyond temporary measures and begin urgent, lasting repairs of the road.
As the gridlock persists, road users are hoping that government intervention will come soon to restore normal traffic flow and relieve the pressure on commuters who have been stranded for hours.
Metro
Five Law Students Barred for 10 Years over Exam Malpractice
The Council of Legal Education (CLE), on Monday, announced that five law students have been barred from sitting for the Bar Final Examination for 10 years over examination malpractice.
The council made this decision during its third-quarter meeting at the Nigerian Law School headquarters in Bwari, Abuja.
In a statement on Sunday, Aderonke Osho, the council’s secretary and director of administration, said the meeting reviewed and approved reports from the examination misconduct committee about cases from the December 2025 Bar Final Examination.
“Following consideration of the reports, the Council approved the disqualification of five (5) candidates found guilty of examination misconduct and barred them from sitting the Bar Final Examination for a period of ten (10) years,” the statement said.
The council also approved penalties for two students found guilty of indiscipline-related misconduct.
However, CLE did not share the names of the students involved or the universities they attended.
Osho also said the meeting discussed policies, regulations, academic issues, and administrative matters related to legal education and running the law school.
In April, the council reported that about 1,067 out of 7,602 candidates failed the 2025 Bar Final Examination.
The results showed 212 candidates earned first-class honours, and 1,216 received second-class upper.
In addition, 2,961 candidates graduated with second-class lower honours, 1,622 passed, and 314 received conditional passes.
A total of 210 candidates did not attend the exam. The council reported an overall pass rate of 79.1 percent, which is lower than last year.
At the same time, 983 candidates failed the 2026 bar final resit. This accounts for 50.3 per cent of the 1,955 candidates who took the exam.
According to the council, only 883 candidates passed the examination held in May, for an overall pass rate of 45.3 per cent, while 54.7 per cent did not attain the prescribed pass mark.
The bar final is the qualifying exam administered by the Nigerian Law School for law graduates who have completed the required vocational training. It is usually held once a year and is necessary for those who want to become legal practitioners in Nigeria.
Metro
The Diplomacy of Dignity: Unlocking Manna, Navigating Doors, and Reclaiming Character
By Tolulope A. Adegoke
Access is the door; character is the key. But manners—manners are the hand that turns it. Turn gently, for every lock has a master, and every master remembers the weight of your touch.
Introduction: The Alchemy of Conduct
In the lexicon of leadership, strategy, vision, and resilience are often heralded as the pillars of success. Yet, beneath these monumental structures lies a more subtle, pervasive, and ultimately decisive foundation: Manners. Far from being mere decorative pleasantries or antiquated social rituals, manners are the operational currency of human interaction. To profess that “Manners give the Manna” is to recognize a profound metaphysical and practical truth—that the quality of one’s conduct directly correlates to the abundance of opportunities, trust, and resources (the “manna”) one receives in a professional and societal context.
This write-up posits that mannerism is not merely etiquette; it is the highest form of Cultural Intelligence (CI). It is the dynamic ability to navigate diverse human ecosystems with empathy, respect, and situational awareness. True leadership, therefore, is not a position of power but a performance of character. When access is treated as a privilege rather than a right, when honor is woven into communication, and when appreciation is rendered with sincerity, the leader transforms from a manager of tasks into an architect of possibilities.
Part I: The Economics of Etiquette—Why “Manners” Yield “Manna”
The adage “Manners give the Manna” is rooted in the economics of social capital. In every organization, the “manna” represents the intangible assets that fuel success: loyalty, discretionary effort, insider information, and collaborative synergy. These are not entitlements; they are gifts granted by subordinates, peers, and superiors based on the perceived worthiness of the receiver.
· Example 1: The Executive and the Elevator. Consider a CEO who steps into a crowded elevator. Instead of ignoring the junior staff member holding the door, the CEO offers a warm acknowledgment, asks about their ongoing project by name, and thanks them for their diligence upon exiting. This 30-second interaction yields “manna” in the form of heightened morale, a sense of visibility, and a narrative of approachability that spreads through the workforce. Conversely, the CEO who stares at their phone in silence harvests resentment. The “manna” of trust is withheld.
· Example 2: The Cross-Cultural Negotiation. A Western executive negotiating with a Japanese corporation arrives early, presents a business card with both hands, and bows slightly upon receipt. This act of cultural mannerism signals profound respect for the host’s hierarchy. It bypasses transactional friction and opens the “door” to relational negotiation. The “manna” here is a contract signed with goodwill, rather than legal rigidity. The executive who ignores these rituals may win the argument but lose the relationship—and thus, the long-term “manna.”
Manners, therefore, are the lubrication that reduces the entropy of human systems. They signal predictability, safety, and mutual regard—conditions under which human beings perform optimally.
Part II: Mannerism as Cultural Intelligence (CI)
Cultural Intelligence (CI) is the capability to relate and work effectively across cultures. However, a significant oversight in contemporary CI training is the reduction of culture to nationality. Culture exists in corporate boardrooms, engineering bays, and creative studios. Mannerism is the practical application of CI.
· Understanding Context (Cognitive CI): Mannerism requires the leader to read the room. In a high-trust Scandinavian startup, mannerism might mean flat hierarchies and first-name basis communication. In a traditional Indian family-run conglomerate, mannerism demands deference to age and tenure. The leader with high CI does not impose a monolithic standard of “politeness” but adapts their behavioral code to honor the prevailing cultural architecture. This is not duplicity; it is the intelligence of adaptation.
· Managing Micro-expressions (Motivational CI): True mannerism is motivational; it stems from the genuine desire to connect. When a leader thanks a team for working late, the mannerism is not in the words “thank you,” but in the tone, the eye contact, and the subsequent action of providing a compensatory day off. This behavioral integrity speaks the universal language of respect, transcending linguistic barriers.
· The Behavioral Index (Behavioral CI): Mannerism is the observable index of one’s cultural intelligence. It is the act of listening without interrupting, the discipline of acknowledging an email within 24 hours, and the grace of giving credit in a public forum. These behaviors indicate that the leader has internalized the cultural values of fairness and dignity.
Part III: “Manners Make the Man”—The Nexus of Character and Identity
“Manners make the Man” is a declarative statement on identity. It suggests that our external conduct is not a mask but a mold—it shapes who we are. A leader who habitually practices courtesy rewires their neural pathways to default to empathy.
· The Construct of Dignity: Manners are the scaffolding of dignity. They prevent the dehumanization of the other. In high-stakes environments, where stress is prevalent, the “Man” (or person) who retains their manners retains their humanity. For instance, during a corporate restructuring, a leader with manners will lay off employees with transparent communication, severance support, and personal acknowledgment of their contributions. This leader maintains their moral standing. The leader who lacks manners treats the layoff as a statistical necessity, reducing humans to numbers. The former preserves their reputation; the latter destroys theirs.
· Character as the Key: The write-up asserts that “men are the doors, but character is the key.” In the professional realm, human beings are the gatekeepers of opportunity. The hiring manager, the client, the mentor—they are the “doors.” No amount of technical skill (the “crowbar”) will open these doors if the character (the “key”) is malformed. Character is the aggregate of one’s manners. It is the consistency of respect, the reliability of word, and the courage to be humble. A leader with impeccable character finds doors swinging open because the gatekeepers trust the hand that turns the key.
Part IV: The Sacred Trust of Access—A Privilege, Not a Right
One of the most dangerous fallacies in leadership is the conflation of access with equality. Access to the CEO, access to confidential data, or access to decision-making corridors is a privilege conferred by the organization or society. It is never an inherent right.
· The Abuse of Familiarity: When a leader assumes that because they have access to a subordinate’s time, they have the right to disregard that subordinate’s personal boundaries, they abuse the privilege. Interrupting a team member’s lunch for a non-urgent query, sending emails at midnight with the expectation of immediate replies, or using positional power to bypass protocols are all abuses of access. This behavior erodes the “manna” of goodwill and replaces it with the “mire” of burnout and attrition.
· The Illusion of Equality: Access does not equal equality. A leader may have the privilege of a private office, but they must treat the cleaner who enters that office with the same dignity as the visiting dignitary. Treating all interactions with dignified honor does not mean treating everyone identically; it means treating everyone with an equivalent standard of respect, tailored to the context. The intern deserves the leader’s full attention during a one-on-one meeting, just as the board member does. The difference is the topic, not the tone.
Part V: The Doorway to All Doors—The Practical Prescription
If “men are the doors,” and “character is the key,” then the leadership prescription is clear: invest relentlessly in the refinement of character through the daily practice of manners.
1. The Prescription of Active Listening: Leadership is often reduced to speaking, but the ultimate manner is silence—the silence that allows others to speak. In board meetings, practice the 70/30 rule: listen 70% of the time, speak 30%. When you listen, you honor the speaker’s presence. This opens the “door” to innovative ideas that the loud leader would never hear.
2. The Prescription of the Handwritten Note: In a digital age, the analog gesture carries disproportionate weight. A leader who sends a handwritten thank-you note to a retiring employee or a successful project lead demonstrates a timeless mannerism. This act of appreciation is a “key” that unlocks immense loyalty. It costs little but yields substantial “manna” in emotional currency.
3. The Prescription of Punctuality and Preparation: Manners are a form of preparation. Arriving on time for a meeting is a statement that you value the other person’s time. Preparing for a discussion shows respect for the intellectual capacity of those attending. This builds a culture of competence and mutual esteem.
4. The Prescription of Public Praise and Private Critique: Criticism must be a gift wrapped in privacy; praise must be a celebration broadcasted publicly. This is a core mannerism of leadership. It protects the dignity of the individual while elevating the standard for the team. When critique is handled with discretion, the “door” of vulnerability remains open for growth.
Part VI: The Abuses and Their Antidotes
Leadership culture across boards often suffers from the “elite syndrome”—the belief that positional power absolves one of basic courtesy.
· The Abuse of Interruption: Leaders frequently interrupt to display intellectual dominance. Antidote: Institute a “no interruption” rule in strategic meetings. Allow the speaker to complete their thought. This forces active listening and often reveals that the “interrupter” had nothing new to add.
· The Abuse of Credit: Leaders often take credit for team successes to bolster their image. Antidote: Practice the art of “Giving the Gold.” Explicitly name the contributors in external communications. When the leader gives away the credit, they gain the far greater reward of trust.
· The Abuse of Emotional Dumping: Leaders sometimes use subordinates as emotional punching bags during stressful periods. Antidote: Cultivate emotional regulation. Establish a “cooling-off” period before responding to aggravating emails or situations. The leader who controls their emotions controls the room.
Part VII: Conclusion—The Synthesis of Civility and Sovereignty
In the final analysis, manners are not soft skills; they are sovereign skills. They are the demarcation between the ruler and the tyrant, the mentor and the demagogue. The ultimate essence of leadership is found not in the magnitude of the decisions one makes, but in the dignity with which one makes them.
We must elevate the narrative: “Manners give the Manna” is not a cliché but a cognitive framework for operational excellence. “Mannerism is Cultural Intelligence” is not a theory but a necessity for the globalized leader. “Manners make the Man” is not a moral judgment but a practical reality—we are what we repeatedly do.
To the leaders of tomorrow: Access is your platform, not your pedestal. Dignity is your armor. Appreciation is your fuel. The character you forge through your daily interactions is the master key that unlocks every door. Lead with the grace that acknowledges the humanity in every handshake, every email, and every glance. In doing so, you will not only harvest the “manna” of success but will cultivate a legacy of honor that outlives your tenure.
This is the concrete solution prescription: To lead is to serve with honor; to serve with honor is to practice impeccable manners; to practice impeccable manners is to secure the key to every door.
We all should further note that: The world does not need more leaders with sharper strategies; it needs leaders with softer hearts and stiffer backbones—leaders who understand that every interaction is an inheritance, and every word is a testament. This write-up, is a written manual, which I have placed in our hands to further turn it into remarkable actions across board, even in generations to come.
Dr. Tolulope A. Adegoke, AMBP-UN is a globally recognized scholar-practitioner and thought leader at the nexus of security, governance, and strategic leadership. His mission is dedicated to advancing ethical governance, strategic human capital development, resilient nation building, and global peace. He can be reached via: tolulopeadegoke01@gmail.com, globalstageimpacts@gmail.com






