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Food for Living: Don’t Rush Life
By Henry Ukazu
Greetings Destiny Friends,
As insatiable beings, we have the tendency to rush at almost everything; food, queue, success and more. What we fail to understand however, is that rushing adds stress and anxiety to life, and this can affect one’s mental state, overtime. Against this backdrop, note that there’s a thin line of difference between destiny and fate. While destiny refers to events that will necessarily happen to a person or thing in the future or the development of events beyond a person’s control which can have an element of supernatural power, fate is a predetermined course of events or series of events/ activities that may occur if one fails to do the things appropriate.
In the journey of life, most times we are consumed about how fast the world is leaving us behind, and as such we tend to think we have to fast track our life, but the truth is there’s a difference between motion and movement. You can be in motion, but not moving. Alternatively, we can say, direction is better than speed.
As human beings, it is normal for us to feel pressured to get our needs and wants. Which vary of course. For example, you might be concerned about making money, starting a business, finding the right partner, having a child or driving to meet an appointment. The truth is everything takes time and regardless of how fast you go, you can’t rush life. An African says, if you want to go fast, go alone, but if you want to go far, go with a team.
Rushing seems to have become our DNA, we are always in a haste to publish an article or even write a book. We rush to become an adult before learning to become a kid. We rush to have a relationship before learning about our partner. We rush to build a billion-dollar business before we start working on our startup. We rush to have sex before we learn what sex is all about. The list is literally endless.
It’s normal to feel the urge to impress yourself, your family, friends and shame your detractors, but the experience of life has humbled us to know that patience is a virtue we all need to crave for. When you rush life, you lose out of some of the beautiful things life has to offer. Succeeding in any field of life entails maturity and learning the ropes. You can’t wake up in the morning and decide to be the President of a country, professor, pilot or even a millionaire. Everything takes time. Even the Book of life states “There’s time for everything”.
In life, there are few things you can’t rush, and one of such is friendship. You can’t force someone to like you; you can only influence their thoughts about you. If you make the mistake of using money or material things to make someone to like you, you’re bound to regret later in life, especially when the resources are no longer available. True friendship takes time to grow.
As a job seeker, there’s a job waiting for you, as an entrepreneur or businessman, there’s an opportunity destined for you. What most people fail to understand is that, If you get what you’re not supposed to get , it might hinder your progress . Let’s take a case study of a man/woman who is not yet mature to marry and marries, when the trials of marriage comes, the challenges might lead the couples to divorce. Moral: Our life is a process. Our skill is a process. Our relationship is a process. Our craft is a process. Our business is a process. Our art is a process.
As you may know, slow and steady wins the race, it is normal to get intimidated while looking at the accomplishments of others, but the reality is that we are all different and blessed with different skills, talents and gifts. We are all unique beings.
Sometimes delay can be a blessing to you, you might be driving to meet a scheduled appointment, and along the way you encounter a terrific traffic, ordinarily you might be mad, but if you able to think out of the box, you might realize that if you arrive early, you might meet unfortunate incident you never planned for. The problem might differ, but the point remains that the traffic might prevent you from a bad situation.
The interesting thing about not rushing through life is that sometimes, we learn such valuable lessons along the way. Sometimes, we learn more about ourselves and discover that we want something different. When you stop rushing and slow down, you enjoy life more. Morla: Rushing allows you to live on the surface rather than going deep.
Steps to live a Productive Life is a Process
Life is a process.
Just like a newborn baby takes time to crawl, talk and walk, we must have the mindset of patience by working for the best and expecting the worst. According to Ralph Ransom once “life is a series of steps. Things are done gradually. Once in a while, there is a giant step, but most of the time we are taking a small, seemingly insignificant step on the stairway of life.” Sometimes we think there is a timeline attached to our life which contains. In reality, there is no timeline.
Learn to live in the present
You have to be intentional in whatever you do in life. For example, rather than thinking so much about the future or the past, appreciate the present, when you eat, fully appreciate your food; when you’re with someone, be with them fully. When you’re walking, appreciate your surroundings, no matter where you are.
Mastery:
Mastery is very critical in our developmental process. Self mastery is priceless. It helps to shape and define you for greater opportunities. Take a mango tree, for example. Initially, when planted as a seed, it is small, and it takes years for it to sprout. But what happens when it hasn’t started growing? It’s collecting the right nutrients while undergoing photosynthesis to grow. And when the result begins to show. you get a solid tree plant. And what happens when its roots grow solid in the ground? It produces fruits, and so it remains forever till it dies out. It’s a slow process, but it’s rewarding.
When you master your craft, you develop some level of expertise in the subject matter. For example, Steve Jobs died as an unfinished project both in his work and life. Micheal Jackson, one of the greatest musicians of all time, died as an unfinished project both in his work and life.
In conclusion, destiny can be delayed, but it can’t be denied, just do your best and leave the rest for God. At the end when your times, no one can stop your blessings. Whatever has your name on it can pass to another person.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
The school of life is an institution no one can graduate from. It is equated to marriage where new things as well as surprises are the order of the day, occurring on a daily basis. However, there are ways to live through life, and one of them is to accept each day as they come.
Life is truly great and enjoyable if we understand it and accept this truth. There’s no doubt that life is such a great challenge, and we must work hard and smart to overcome the challenge. Once we acknowledge it, nothing really matters any longer because life becomes an infinitely easier project to pursue.
As human beings, we will be tested and tempted. One’s ability to overcome each test and temptation will set one on a higher pedestal. The book of life made us understand there’s time for everything. A time to cry, and a time to laugh, a time to sow and a time to reap, According to the Book of life “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.”
One thing is certain if one looks at the timing- they all come in stages and phases. When there’s misplaced priority, success appears like mirage. One’s ability to manage each phase will strengthen one.
Life comes in several stages. When a child is born, the child will learn to crawl before learning how to walk and run. The same is applicable for a student who is interested in education, he will attend high school, college and post graduate studies. These are all stages of life.
The same phase is applicable in relationships and marriage. During the dating and courting stage, the relationship is different, immediately the parties marry, the tone changes. Marriage has three stages namely: Romance (or Honeymoon) stage, Power Struggle (or Disillusionment) stage, and Real Love (or Mature/Conscious Love) stage.
Let’s analyze each stage:
Romance/Honeymoon: (The “Falling in Love” Phase)
This stage is characterized by high intensity, passion, and bonding. At this stage, partners focus on similarities and overlook flaws. At this stage a partner might step on the other partner and instead of getting hurt, the partner will smile and say something like: I love the way you stepped on me, or step on me harder, it makes me endure the love. At this stage partners do everything together. This stage usually lasts from a few weeks to a couple of years.
The first three to five years of marriage can generally be regarded as the most challenging part of marriage, especially the kids start coming in; if it’s not properly managed, the marriage might hit the rock.
Power Struggle/Disillusionment (The “Reckoning” Phase)
During this stage, the “rose-colored glasses” usually come off, and partners notice flaws and differences, leading to “disillusionment, disappointment, and early conflicts”. It is at this stage kids start coming up and the challenge of life starts hitting up. The stage is often characterized by struggles with control, communication, and frustration over unmet expectations. Many couples usually get stuck here, if proper is not applied, it might end the relationship.
Stage 3: Real Love/Mature Love (The “Conscious” Phase)
At this stage, the couples have seen it all. They have been through all stages of life and have seen it all. There’s literally little or nothing that can affect marriage at this stage. It’s only unimaginable and unbecoming acts that lead to the fundamental tenets of marriage that can make the marriage hit the rock.
At this stage couples have trained their children through colleges, and some may have married. Couples will be able to laugh over their acts and start to bond again.
At this stage, couples have been able to navigate their conflict and have learnt to accept their partner’s flaws and choose to build a stable, loving, and mature relationship. Their focus is usually to build a deeper commitment to their marital vows, finally accepting each partner for whom they are, and working together to create a conscious and intentional partnership.
The outcome is usually a sense of safety, connection and lasting love: A sense of safety, deep connection, and lasting love.
In business, the principle is not exempted. An entrepreneur will begin a business, grow it, attract customers, hire employees and then institutionalize it. All these stages come with several phases if one is intentional.
An employee who is hired as an entry level position will have to prove his worth by producing measurable results to walk through the corporate ladder to become Chief Executive Officer, Chief Operating Officer, Chief Financial Officer or one of the higher ups. This position doesn’t come ordinarily; one must have earned it.
In conclusion, regardless of what stage one is experiencing or facing, one thing is certain, this too shall pass, and we shall overcome. So, just hang in there.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
The African Democratic Congress (ADC) has declared that it would never be intimidated, distracted, or silenced in its push to realize a better Nigeria.
Spokesman of the ADC, Bolaji Abdullahi, said this in reaction to the Supreme Court ruling, which affirmed David Mark’s leadership of the party.
Abdullahi said the judgment has affirmed that the Mark and Rauf Aregbesola leadership of the party is legitimate.
Abdullahi said: “The African Democratic Congress (ADC) congratulates all our members and leaders across the country on today’s Supreme Court ruling which affirmed the leadership of our party under Senator David Mark as National Chairman, and Ogbeni Rauf Aregbesola as National Secretary.
“Today’s decision is a clear affirmation that our party, its structures, and its leadership under our National Chairman, Senator Mark, and our National Secretary, Ogbeni Aregbesola, are legitimate.
“We commend the five-man panel of the Supreme Court, whose unanimous judgment has today done great credit to the judiciary in our country and our political system.
“However, while we welcome this judgment, we do not mistake it for the end of the struggle. The events leading up to this moment have exposed a troubling pattern of interference, bad faith, and attempts to weaken opposition voices in Nigeria.
“Let it be clearly stated: the ADC will not be intimidated, distracted, or silenced. We remain resolute in our mission to provide Nigerians with a credible alternative.
“We therefore urge all our members, supporters, and democratic stakeholders across the country to remain vigilant.”
The campaign team of Olajide Adediran, popularly known as Jandor, has announced that their leader, who is Governorship aspirant, has formally purchased the Expression of Interest and Nomination Forms of the All Progressives Congress ahead of the 2027 general elections in Lagos State.
The development was disclosed in a press statement issued on Wednesday by Gbenga Ogunleye, spokesperson for the Jandor campaign organisation, marking a significant step in Adediran’s bid to contest for the state’s top office.
According to the statement, the move underscores Adediran’s commitment to due process and strict adherence to the party’s internal democratic procedures.
The governorship aspirant also reiterated his alignment with the party’s decision to adopt direct primaries for all elective positions, expressing optimism that the process would enhance grassroots participation, strengthen unity within the party, and promote inclusiveness in the emergence of candidates.
Jandor further reaffirmed his loyalty to the National Leader of the APC and President of Nigeria, Bola Ahmed Tinubu, while also paying tribute to party leaders in Lagos State for their continued guidance and commitment to progressive ideals.
He also extended gratitude to members of the JAGABAN–JANDOR 2027 Movement, young Lagosians, and supporters who contributed financially towards the purchase of the nomination forms, commending their dedication and belief in his leadership capacity.
Jandor assured party members and residents of Lagos State that his governorship ambition is rooted in unity, inclusiveness, and a commitment to sustaining and advancing good governance under the APC platform.
