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Food for Living: Set and Maintain a Standard
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
It is universally said that if one doesn’t stand for anything, they will fall for everything. One of the things that makes us stand out in school, workplace, church, politics, entertainment, social gathering or in public space in general is the standard we set for ourselves.
At the beginning of every year, we make resolutions, but the challenge is keeping to it. It’s easier to set standards, but maintaining it is what makes the difference. The same way it’s easy to get to the top, and difficult staying at the top. This is the most challenging part because mych as it takes sacrifice to get to the top, it takes a higher standard to remain at the top.
Every workplace has a standard, every school has a standard, every congregation has a standard, every organization has a standard, and every social or political group also has a standard. These standards are enshrined in their policy, bye laws and work culture, and if one breaches any of them, they will be subjected to the agreed consequences.
Even as human beings, we all have standards we set for ourselves. While what works for Mr. A might not work for Mr. B, and what Mr. A might accept, Mr. B might not accept. This is why it’s always good to know what works for anyone and know how to follow or work with them.
Our standards can be seen in our values, personalities, ideology and the vision we hold dear. While some people might accept or tolerate lateness at a place of work if one offers a reasonable excuse, another party might have a different opinion based on standard work policy.
While some ladies might detest messing around with the opposite sex for benefits, because they value their body, fear and rever God, and believe in integrity, other ladies might see it as fun or trade by barter. For those in government, while some employees will see nothing wrong in giving kickbacks to get certain favours and opportunities, other employees might have a different feeling because they are schooled to believe that meritocracy pays better than mediocrity.
In the journey of life, we must set the standard for others to follow, be the standard, or better still maintain the high standards already set by others.
As a Christian, the Book of life states in Romans 8:12, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will”. The message is simply stating, as children of God, we are not encouraged to follow the worldly patterns of indulging in worldly things that please the flesh and deprive us of having a good relationship with God.
To do this, we must detach from people and environments that put us in such uncomfortable positions or situations. Setting this standard might not be easy, trust me, it will be very challenging because it will be tested, and may God help you if you don’t pass the test.
Setting standards operates or works in different standards. Imagine a man, who has a six- or eight-cylinder engine, it is expected of them to have a higher gas for their car, but if they use a cheaper gas for their car, it might affect the car. That’s another way of setting standards.
During one of my challenging times, I felt frustrated on how to put gas in my car, I was wondering if I should use 87 as opposed to 89 which is compatible with my car just to save cost, I ended up using 89 regardless of my financial situation. This to me is a standard, because I strongly believe and know the universe will work with me in attracting the right opportunity in due time.
In setting standards, here is my advice: never lower your worth for anyone, unless you are trying to be humble or send a desired and impactful message. If you have a business, don’t lower your standard for anyone just to please them. If for instance, you sell a product or offer a service, please don’t lower your price for prospective clients or customer, even if you are tempted to do so to make sales, make it appear like you are giving them a discount or deal they can’t afford to miss while making them understand you are doing them a favour so they don’t think you are desperate to sell.
This is the psychology of life and business. When human beings feel you are selling a product cheap, their mindset is wired to believe it’s either cheap or something is not adding up well. But when they pay a higher price, or sense they can’t afford the commodity, they tend to respect the product or service.
Alternatively, when people offer you a product you can’t afford, instead of saying the price is too expensive, simply say, I will keep it in mind or I will consider getting it later, or better still, you can request a discount or a form of deal. Recognize the fact that every product has a price tag.
Did you know that standard works with value? It is the value you place on somebody, a product or a service that determines the recognition and respect a person accords it. Let me share a practical and personal example with you. When I published my first book, I was desperate to have the book outside. I wanted every high-profile person with influence to get a copy of the book. As a matter of fact, anybody I see on the road or any relevant event of interest, I always look for an opportunity to give them a copy of my book, especially when I perceive they work in a particular organization, know someone of influence or even have extra cash to spare.
The idea was simply to take a picture with the person just to get publicity. In some situations, I was tempted to sell my book for whatever the person can afford with the mindset that who knows who might see the book in the hands of that person and decide to read it. It worked in some situations, but it backfired in many situations because not many people paid attention to my book. Some just accepted it to make me feel good, while some said they didn’t want to accept it because they might not open it, and they will prefer me to keep it as opposed to wasting it.
What lesson did I learn? I have since realized to stick to who I am, the value in my book as opposed to appearing desperate. I have also learnt to keep my value intact opposed to trying to please supposed benefactors or anyone because those that matter don’t bother and those that bother don’t matter. I also realized that anyone that wants to patronize you will do so with little or no compulsion, especially when you have a thriving business.
Understanding a standard can be relative because it depends on the point one is viewing from.
In conclusion, as you journey forward, endeavour to set your standards so others will know where you stand at any point in time.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
Secrets are exclusive preserves of certain individuals or institutions. They are one’s advantage over others, in the sense of ‘there’s something I know, which no one else knows. No one can ever claim that they don’t have a secret, either in the good or bad light.
Secrets therefore, exist in the family circle, business terrain, academic environment, career/professional pursuit, health management, spiritual connectivity and even in everyday personal living. It is an undeniable fact that everyone has a secret that works for them.
Let’s take a minute to discuss some of the aforementioned secrets.
Family
Every family has a secret. It will be foolhardy for anyone to disclose family secrets. Most families die with their secrets. To understand how family secrets work, imagine the Coca-Cola company. The family is said to be the only one in the world that has the formula for the beverage; a trade secret that originated with its creator, John Pemberton.
It is said that not even all family members enter the room where Coca-Cola is mixed or manufactured for fear of the secret being divulged. Imagine where spouses have access to the room and the marriage goes south, there’s a tendency that a spiteful divorced partner might leak the secret and the rest as they say is history.
There are many secrets that bind many families which only the immediate family members know. In some cases, only the parents or grandparents know. They can decide to share the secret to either the first male child, first female child or even a member of the family that one considers rational. For instance, imagine where a family is faced with a peculiar life threatening illness which ordinarily might scare anyone who wants to get married into that family, it will be stupid for anyone to spit it out, that act alone can make the intending spouse to reconsider his/her plan to marry from the family.
Business
Every business has a trade secret. Trade secrets are what makes a business unique. Every business has a unique selling point. (USP), which is a distinct benefit that sets the business or product apart from its competitors. A shrewd businessman will never leak his secret to his employees or competitors. The best his employees will know are the values, the operational systems or structures of the business and how his mindset works. But what makes the business stand out is the mystery that one will need to unravel.
Academic
Every student has a distinct trait that makes him/her succeed academically. This unique trait makes the student exceptional. For any student to succeed in their academics, he must know himself and what works for him. While some might study at night, some might study during the day, others might just listen during the lecture and understand the key points.
It’s sad to see students, who haven’t discovered who they are and what works for them following students who have discovered who they are. For example, while some students have good listening and understanding ability, and can listen to lectures and read a little and pass their examinations, some other students will have to read the course material before the lecture, listen during the lecture, read after the lecture and read thoroughly for examination before they can get a decent grade.
In some cases, they might not get the desired grade. Some students will even party hard during the day and at night they study, while some will party at night and study during the day. So, you can see that while some students have discovered themselves and what works for them, some others follow them sheepishly. Moral: Know what works for you and do what works for you because according to Oscar Wilde, “be yourself because others are taken”.
Career/Profession
Every career professional has a secret that works for them. In the same way, every industry knows what makes it stands out. The secret of what makes someone in the entertainment industry successful is quite different from what makes someone in politics or law enforcement, energy, education, legal, or health sector different. They all have different strokes, and the ability of one to do the needful in addition to playing the associated game can be the game changer.
Health
Health is a personal thing. Nobody knows you more than you know yourself. To show you how secretive and important one’s health is, it’s been said that there are three kinds of life: Public life, private life and secret life.
Your public life is the life that is generally known by everyone. It is the character we exhibit in the public space. It can also be regarded as the image perception lifestyle; we don’t generally go around revealing our health status in the public domain except where necessary. The private lifestyle; this is the kind of life only our family and close friends know.
Again, we don’t disclose such pertinent information to them only where and when necessary, then we have the secret lifestyle which only us and our creator knows. In some cases, we go to the graveyard with this. Do you see why health is a personal issue which needs to be kept in a secret place?
Personal
As mentioned earlier, everyone is unique. One of the best things that can happen to anyone is knowing themselves, and knowing what makes them different. I strongly believe we all have seeds of greatness in us. What works for Mr. A might not work for Mr. B. Like I always say, you can copy my style, but you can’t be me because imitation is a limitation.
For instance, I have unique energy and inspiration when it comes to writing. I have developed a keen interest and passion for writing. If tomorrow I become very successful or attract a unique opportunity, and someone decides to try writing to attract similar opportunities, the person might fail because God is the one that decides what opportunities come to anyone nor matter how hard someone may work.
Spiritual
This is another interesting aspect of life. Life is indeed spiritual. There’s nothing that happens physically without taking place spiritually. Everyone has a covenant point that was assigned to them at birth. Once that covenant point is touched that fellow might lose their blessings, anointing or what makes them strong.
There have been many testimonies about this. For instance, in the Bible, Samson’s touching point was his hair. He knows his power lies in his hair, that’s why Delilah tried so many times to know the secret of his strength, but Samson refused to tell her. She tried to make him drunk, but Samson still has the power. Samson repeatedly lied to Delilah about the secret of his strength, first saying it was new bowstrings, then new ropes, and finally by weaving his hair into a loom. Each time, he easily broke free, but Delilah continued to pressure him.
Weary from her constant questioning, Samson finally confessed that his strength was tied to his hair, which had never been cut because he was a Nazirite from birth. Delilah then called for a man to shave Samson’s seven locks of hair while he slept in her lap. His secret was revealed. His hair was cut. He strength was gone.
Do you see that Samson’s secret place was his hair?
In conclusion, depending on what we are working on, we all have our secret strength and place. The onus is on us to cultivate and dwell on this secret place to avoid losing power and focus.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Amid growing insecurity in different parts of the country, Niger State Governor, Umaru Bago, has urged residents to defend themselves against persistent bandit attacks.
He insisted that his administration would neither negotiate with nor pay ransom to criminals under any circumstances.
Bago made the declaration during a visit to the Rijau and Magama local government areas, where several communities were recently attacked by bandits operating from the Kontagora axis.
The governor said the State has reached a critical stage that demands collective action, warning that ransom payments would only embolden the criminals and turn kidnapping into a profitable venture.
“I will not negotiate with bandits. I will not pay ransom.
“The moment we start paying, they will open shop on our heads and continue kidnapping people,” he said.
“The situation has reached a state of war that requires collective resistance. We are surrounded by enemies, but we will not give up.
“The constitution gives us the right to defend our lives and property, and we will do just that,” the governor added.
Describing the recurring attacks and displacement of residents as “embarrassing and unacceptable,” Bago announced plans to recruit and train 10,000 personnel into the state’s joint task force to strengthen community security and restore peace.
In a statement issued by his Special Adviser on Print Media, Aisha Wakaso, the governor also announced a total ban on all mining activities across Zone C of the state.
The affected local government areas include Magama, Kontagora, Rijau, Wushishi, Mariga, Borgu, Mashegu, and Agwara.
Bago explained that illegal mining had become a major driver of insecurity in the zone, noting that many miners had unrestricted access to forest areas considered unsafe for residents.
“It is suspicious that miners can enter the forests freely, yet the bandits don’t touch them. I have ordered the Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps (NSCDC) to arrest anyone caught engaging in mining activities,” he said.
Governor Bago also reaffirmed his administration’s commitment to ending the cycle of violence and restoring lasting peace throughout the state.
The Nigeria Police have reportedly arrested human rights activist Omoyele Sowore.
Sowore was taken into custody at the Federal High Court in Abuja.
This was revealed in a post on X by human rights lawyer Inibehe Effiong, who accused the police and President Bola Tinubu’s administration of undermining Nigeria’s judicial system.
He wrote: “The arrest of Omoyele Sowore at the Federal High Court in Abuja moments ago is preposterous.
“The police and the Tinubu regime are making a mockery of our judicial system.He should be freed immediately. Stop the shenanigans.”
Sowore had earlier posted on Facebook that he was with Kanu Agabi, the lead lawyer for Nnamdi Kanu, at the Federal High Court.
According to him, Agabi disclosed that his team would be withdrawing from the case, leaving Kanu to continue his trial without representation.
