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Food for Living: The Experience of Life
By Henry Ukazu
Greetings Dear Friends,
Life is an experience every one of us must surely pass through. It is often said that our experience shapes/defines who we are. Regardless of how true or false you may feel about life, you’ll agree with me that to a reasonable extent, your experience has helped to shape some of your thoughts and actions. Isn’t it true that it is only the person who wears the shoe who can tell where the pinches? It is a well-established fact that experience is the best teacher. This is because we all feel pains differently. According to a philosopher, life is about experiences. We all have to dream, strive, and fail before we can achieve success. Maybe we’ll discover along the way that the journey is more important than the destination
In one of my articles, published a couple of years ago what is life and how can one live through it? I defined life as a woman because you cannot “really” know her. During the course of this article, we shall be discussing many components of life and how the experience can shape you. We all need experience to survive through life because it helps to shape us in addition to giving us more exposure, opportunity, and respect. For instance, we all sit in the same classroom, but we don’t hear and understand the same thing; we all look at a picture but we don’t see the same thing; we all might be walking to a location but we all have a different vision; we all have a business but we run it differently based on our experiences, knowledge and even networks. The same theory is applicable to marriage, job, academics, business, sports etc.
Let’s share some practical details on how experience can shape us.
Marriage/Relationship
This is one of the most complicated and sensitive part of life any human can relate to. Marriage in simple term is life itself. As fondly opined by many rational minds, it is the school one can never graduate from, because you’ll continue to learn until the end of life. In our contemporary society, we have recorded so many divorces and questions flood the mind as what the secret to a successful marriage relationship actually is. Well, in my own humble opinion, there’s no clear cut secret to marriage except the presence of true love between both parties. This is because lots of factors contribute to a make a successful marriage. Every marriage is different and only the partners themselves can decide how they can manage their affairs. Where there’s a misunderstanding between both partners, it will be in their best interest to settle it themselves, and where they can’t settle it, a married or informed counselor can assist. I’m not insinuating that unmarried counselors with insightful positive experience can’t advise married couples, but I do know that whenever couples have problems, they are the only ones who can address their concerns better because nobody knows the root and fundamental cause of the problem more than do especially when they are not comfortable letting it out which leaves the counselor with the only option of speaking from his/her own experience. There have been cases where unmarried couples give advice to married people, in as much I won’t kick against that idea, I feel that sometimes, if not most times, experience plays a huge role in solving problems especially a sensitive one like marriage. Moral: somethings are best experienced than imagined. This is because of the practicality that comes with it. It’s just like driving, having sex, running a business etc.
Business
Just like the saying, old wine tastes better, the same can be said for business. The more time you spend learning the ropes in addition to equipping yourself with knowledge can play a huge role in shaping your business. Just like every great work takes time to manifest, business takes time to grow. I doubt if there’s any overnight successful in business. If at all one ever exist, it’s an exceptional circumstance it’s quite unfortunate many people jump into a business with the mindset of having a great turn over/profit just because they see it is flourishing or they see their friends/colleagues making great strides in the industry. What they fail to understand is that it is not greener out there and every business has a secret.
It’s imperative to note that one of the greatest ways to succeed in business is by having a great network. People find it comfortable to relate with people they know. According to Robin Sharma, “the business of business is relationship, but the business of life human connection”. In business, a lot of factors come into consideration before one can have a headway. First and foremost you must know what you are passionate about and what your skills set is composed of. Then, give yourself the necessary time to learn the business/trade. This learning can take several forms such as reading, volunteering, taking a class, networking and gaining exposure in the sector.
Furthermore, to succeed in business, you must learn soft skills in addition to being creative with emotional intelligence. For example, a creative and proactive businessman/woman must meet people where are as opposed to having the clients meet him/her where he/she is. A prudent business-minded fellow must have a great attitude to listen to customers, he/she must take the initiative of providing ideas on what might be beneficial to the business, and he/she must have a great attitude to relate with not only his/her clients but the public at large. According to John Maxell, ‘Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them’.
Job
One of the places that experience plays an influential role is the aspect of a job. Most employers always look for candidates with experience during the hiring process. It’s only in a few and rare instance they accept a candidate without experience. An experienced candidate tends to do a better job than a new hire. For example, a new hire may do the job in the right way, but an experienced being may do it in an efficient way.
Academic
In our contemporary society, many people seem people to downplay the role of education as it relates to succeeding in life. They opine that you can always “learn from the street”, you can also learn in an informal way as opposed to formal education. However, they fail to realize that education itself is an experience because you need to get theoretical knowledge before applying practical knowledge. It should be noted that academic education gives you an edge over a person who doesn’t have any opportunity/exposure to one. It is a well-established fact that no knowledge is a waste and having a basic theoretical knowledge can take the place of experience in certain situations.
Sports
This is another great area where experience plays a role. Sports is one of the great areas where experience is needed. It doesn’t matter if you play football, soccer, table tennis, volleyball, basketball, track and felid events and wresting. Your experience will definitely make a difference if you harness it well.
In conclusion, regardless of what you may have experienced through life, having a positive attitude is a guaranteed way of overcoming negative experience. According to Reno Omokri, an author and Pastor, “the secret of love is sacrifice. The secret of happiness is giving; the secret of life is GOD.” This nugget may have informed his line of thought. I don’t know your experience, but whatever it is continue to learn from it because one day it will add up and when you look back, you’ll understand why you have to have to go through the whole experience.
Personal
Just like every taste bud is different, each and every one of us experience different things in life. According to Eleanor Roosevelt, “The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.” If you ask anyone what’s the purpose of life, you’ll likely receive different responses. The answer to this question is subjective and deeply personal. Different things are important to us throughout the course of our lives. Yet one thing stays with us no matter where we go: our experiences. With respect to personal experience, definitely it’s important to note that your network determines your net worth. Therefore, cultivate your friendships and find companies that fulfill you. It’s from those experiences in life that you’ll learn and grow. In this process, we can learn valuable lessons about ourselves and the world around us. So, don’t be hard on yourself.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success. He can be reached via henrous@gmail.com
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
The mind is very powerful, so powerful that most people do not know what they possess. To this extent, some have given out their mind-power without knowing it. The power of the mind is akeen to a voice that speaks. This is because the human is more or less the strongest arsenal in everyone’s possession.
The voice brings freedom; it’s so inalienable that we can use it during elections, meetings, and where opinion matters. That’s why I strongly believe that as a human being, when you lose everything, you must not lose the power of your voice.
As a progressive being, there are many things that battle for our attention: family, friends, career, health, even our inner self demands attention. One of the greatest challenges we’ll have as human beings is how to apportion time to all of them because they all want to succeed. Failing to give them their due attention might lead to deficiency, which can ultimately lead to failure.
To succeed in all areas of life whether in business, academic, family, etc., one must have a winning mentality. The failure and success of anyone or project starts from the mind. When the mind has been conquered, it will be hard for anyone to succeed. That’s why one has to be intentional in what they consume whether it relates to the books they read, the association they keep and the thoughts they entertain.
We are shaped by our thoughts. According to Napoleon Hill in his book “Think and Grow Rich”, he stated, “whatsoever the mind can conceive, believe it can achieve it”. To succeed in life, we must have a winning mindset. One of the major problems we have as human beings is that sometimes we give up too early, especially when the odds are against us. But when we exhibit a winning mindset, failures, betrayals, setbacks, detractors, are seen as challenges and hurdles we must overcome to get to the promised land.
There are many examples of great minds who have exercised a winner mindset, a great name that comes to mind is Abraham Lincoln. Abraham Lincoln lost his job in 1832. He was defeated for state legislature in 1832. He failed in business in 1833 and was elected to the state legislature in 1834. His sweetheart died in 1835. He had a nervous breakdown in 1836 and was defeated for Speaker in 1838. In 1843, he was defeated for nomination for Congress. In 1846, he was elected to Congress and in 1848, he lost renomination in 1848. In 1849, he was rejected for land officer. In 1854, he was defeated for the U.S. Senate. Again, he was defeated for nomination for Vice President in 1856 and defeated for U.S. Senate in 1858. Finally, in 1860, he was elected the 16th President of the United States of America.
If we are honest with ourselves, it will be hard for one to forge ahead after experiencing numerous setbacks in business, family, health, career, and even personal challenges. I had to use Abraham Lincoln because he embodies the winner mindset.
The winner’s mindset is not only limited to one’s thoughts. It’s applicable to every area of one’s life. The winner’s mindset is more than just having good thoughts, thinking positively or even standing up when one fails. No, it entails more than that. The winner’s mindset is a lifestyle which preaches the gospel of doing what you must do and be appreciative of the feedback.
The winner’s mindset has the mentality of preparing for the best and expecting the worst. This entails one can’t be taken by surprise if their plans don’t work out well, and this means one will have to go back to the drawing board to fix it.
A good way to understand how a winner’s mindset plays out can be seen during football(soccer) competitions or track and field events where athletes have almost given up hope of winning the game or race.
A case of interest that comes to mind was during the 1996 Atlanta Olympics soccer semi-final competition where the Nigeria Dream team defeated the Brazil Seleção Brasileira de Futebol team in what can be considered one of the greatest comebacks in football history.
Let me give a brief overview, the Nigerian team were down with two goals. As a matter of fact, at a time during the match, the Brazilian team scored a fourth goal which was disqualified. The Nigerian team also had a penalty they lost. Going into the Semi final, the Brazilians were considered the favorites, and the Nigeria team were considered the underdogs. The odds were literally against the Nigeria team because the Brazilians had a formidable team.
Despite the Brazilian team leading Nigeria 3-1, the Nigerian team were able to bounce back during the last 15 minutes and won the game during the extra time. While is this story interesting and relevant? Well, in the game of soccer, nobody gives up until the final whistle is blown by the referee and the same applies in track and field events especially in track events. We have seen scenarios where athletes were almost at the finish line but lost out due to fatigue or one challenge or the other, the athlete fails to finish the race. It gets interesting during relay races.
Back to the soccer competition, one factor that helped the Nigerian team was the winner mindset. They didn’t give up despite the few minutes remaining in the game. They still gave their best and it paid off. It’s instructive to note that the average Nigerian always has the can-do mindset. The average Nigerian hardly gives up.
According to Dr. Yomi Garnett, a renowned ghostwriter, “To be a winner, you have to act like one. Winners don’t function the way most people do. They are always striving, always analyzing, and always questioning themselves. They tend to notice details that other people miss or overlook. Indeed, it is clear that great people have two things in common: a passion to succeed and an almost obsessive attention to detail.
In conclusion, the question we’ll have to ask ourselves is what kind of mentality do we have? Do you have a negative or positive mindset? When people see challenges, do you see solutions or opportunities to solve problems to create wealth? Do you have a growth mindset or poverty mindset?
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
The Minister of Police Affairs, Ibrahim Gaidam, has expressed deep satisfaction with the conduct of the ongoing recruitment exercises for its orderly and transparent nature across the country.
He made the commendation, according to a statement made available to the National Association of Online Security News Publishers (NAOSNP), while receiving feedback from filed officers across the country and described the process as not just a routine exercise, but a critical step toward rebuilding public trust and enhancing the operational capacity of the Nigeria Police Force.
The Minister urged all participants to remain law-abiding, disciplined, and patient throughout the screening process. He emphasized that integrity and respect for due process are as important as physical and academic qualifications, noting that the future of policing in Nigeria depends largely on the character and commitment of those who wear the uniform.
“This is more than recruitment; it is a call to national service,” he stated. “Nigeria needs men and women of honor, individuals who understand that security is the foundation upon which development and prosperity are built.” Gaidam stressed.
The Minister also extended heartfelt appreciation to the administration of President Bola Ahmed Tinubu GCFR for its bold and strategic approval of the recruitment of 50,000 police personnel.
He stressed that the unprecedented move demonstrates a clear resolve to address longstanding gaps in manpower while repositioning the Police Force to meet modern security challenges, just as he noted that beyond numbers, the current administration is focused on meaningful reform—transforming policing into a more professional, accountable, and citizen-centered institution.
Gaidam stated that from improved training frameworks to enhanced welfare and operational support, the reform agenda signals a new era for law enforcement in Nigeria.
The Minister noted that the ongoing recruitment exercise, therefore, stands as a symbol of renewed hope—a bridge between the present challenges and a future where communities feel safer, justice is more accessible, and the rule of law is upheld without compromise.
As the screening continues across the nation, the Minister called on all stakeholders—traditional leaders, community members, and institutions, to support the process and encourage eligible youths to participate with sincerity and patriotism.
“Nigeria’s path to a safer, more secure future is being steadily strengthened through deliberate reforms and renewed commitment to nation-building noting that at the heart of this progress is the ongoing nationwide police recruitment screening exercise, an initiative that reflects both hope and responsibility for thousands of young Nigerians,” the Minister concluded.
Presidential spokesperson, Mr. Bayo Onanuga, has launched a scathing attack on Rauf Aregbesola following the latter’s criticism of President Bola Tinubu’s administration.
The exchange comes hours after Aregbesola, while speaking at the convention of the African Democratic Congress (ADC) on Tuesday, described the Tinubu administration as a government of “scammers”, urging Nigerians to block it from retaining power after the 2027 general elections.
“If allowed, this regime will continue to chant renewed hope till eternity. We have a duty to stop these scammers from retaining power,” Aregbesola said.
In a swift response, Onanuga dismissed the remarks and accused the former Governor of Osun State of hypocrisy and poor performance during his time in office.
“My attention has been drawn to Rauf Aregbesola’s attack on the Tinubu administration at today’s illegal elective convention of the ADC — a party of desperados and power mongers who, to date, have not articulated any credible plan for Nigeria,” he said.
Onanuga further criticised Aregbesola for failing to reflect on his own record before attacking his “former boss and benefactor.”
“Unfortunately, Aregbesola did not undertake any honest self-reflection on his own record in public office — as governor or as Minister of Interior,” he stated.
He alleged that Aregbesola’s tenure as governor of Osun State was marked by hardship and poor economic management.
“His eight years as governor of Osun State were characterised by unmitigated hardship for the people. Under his half-baked socialist policies, civil servants went unpaid for months, and those who were paid received only a fraction of their salaries,” Onanuga said.
“It is to Aregbesola’s infamy that Osun became known as a State receiving negative federal allocation and paying just 20 to 30 per cent of normal salaries. It was worse for pensioners in Aregbesola’s Osun State. Many pensioners who relied on their meagre monthly payments died because they were not paid at all.”
Turning to Aregbesola’s tenure as Minister of Interior under former President Muhammadu Buhari, Onanuga said it recorded major security lapses.
“As Minister of Interior under President Muhammadu Buhari, his tenure witnessed the highest number of jailbreaks in Nigeria’s history — including the infamous Kuje Prison escape in Abuja,” he said.
“During his four years, obtaining a Nigerian passport became a nightmarish process, and there were 15 major attacks on correctional facilities in Jos, Abolongo, Imo, Kabba, and Okitipupa, resulting in over 4,000 inmates escaping to join criminal elements.”
Onanuga added, “For someone who failed so woefully to secure our correctional centres and uphold his duties between 2019 and 2023, it is ironic that Aregbesola now seeks to lecture others on insecurity.”
He further accused Aregbesola and other ADC leaders of lacking credible policy alternatives stating, “The real scammers are the politicians inside the SPV called ADC.”
Defending the current administration, Onanuga said the government had acknowledged challenges arising from reforms but was implementing measures to mitigate their impact.
“The Tinubu administration has never shied away from acknowledging that policy reforms have brought unintended consequences, impacting the most vulnerable,” he said, adding that efforts such as wage increases, social support programmes, and economic reforms were underway.
He insisted that the administration’s Renewed Hope Agenda was yielding results, including improved economic indicators and increased investor confidence.
“The Renewed Hope Agenda is not a scam,” Onanuga said, maintaining that the government would continue its policies to stabilise the economy and address security challenges.
