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Food for Living: The Test of Confidence
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By Henry Ukazu
Greetings Friends,
Self-confidence is one of the greatest skills any progressive and productive minded being must have. Self-confidence is truly priceless because it cuts across all levels of life. During interviews, one of the qualities interviewers look for in a candidate is your level of confidence. At work environments, supervisors, Directors look for confidence, capability, and competence in a candidate before any task is delegated to them. Students, athletics, public speakers, sportsmen, actors, leaders, etc. all need confidence to succeed.
The test of confidence is truly a hard one when we try to be practical with our beliefs. This is because there are so many distractions begging for our attention. Confidence is one of the greatest skills a leader must possess because it helps to conquer a lot of fears in addition to conquering new grounds. It’s sad to note that a lot of people have failed in life despite having the background knowledge and information they need to succeed simply because they lack confidence in expressing their thoughts and following their dreams and passion.
Confidence people don’t follow the bandwagon. They walk alone when the world is moving in a different direction. Confident people know themselves, they know what’s unique about them. They know their strengths and weakness and above all, they know themselves. In the journey of life, you must surely go through test for your confidence to be established. So, always appreciate and value your journey. During the course of this article, we shall be discussing how we can develop self-confidence.
A person with high self-confidence seems to live life with passion and enthusiasm. People tend to trust and follow confident people. Confident people are not deterred by adversaries. Just to understand how confidence plays a role plays in real life, imagine having a lion leading a flock of sheep for a war versus having a sheep leading a troop of lions. Who will be respected most?
At any point in life, we’ll be required to prove ourselves. This proof might result in us being tested in what we believe in. This can be a test of faith, business, relationship, careers, and life generally. It is this test that will define and probably shape you. Let’s take a classic case of an entrepreneur who feels working 9-5 job is not for him or her. He/she decides to quit his/her job to follow his/her dreams of becoming an entrepreneur. If you’ll agree with me, it takes courage and confidence to quit your job in order to be an entrepreneur. There have been cases of people who left good jobs to follow their dreams. Some of these people relocated to thousands of miles outside their comfort zone just to follow their passion. These are some of the examples of the test of confidence.
We live in a world where a lot of people play to the gallery by trying to impress people. These set of individuals fail to realize the fact that, the best way of living a fulfilling life is by being themselves. Impressing people is like living a fake life and expecting people to take you serious. In the worlds Oscar Wilde “Be yourself, everyone is taken”. Anyone who wants to be part of your success story will support your works. You won’t need to beg for their confirmation. Just so you know, people who truly care don’t matter and those who matter don’t care.
Confident people don’t care what others think about them. They don’t try to impress people with their clothes, money, knowledge, network, and strength because they truly know themselves. Confident people are talented and gifted set of people who know their craft very well. I have seen cases in life where Human Resource managers hire people with less qualified certificates for a position over someone with certificates just because of the skills, personality, attitude and their confidence to learn and grow which the person brings to the table as opposed to a candidate with great “qualifications” with little or confidence or undertaking a new task.
The first test of lack of confidence you can see in an individual is insecurity. Insecure people always have fear and doubt in their minds. Most times our insecurity makes us seek validation from other people, but the truly confident people know that a free being is one who does not care about what other people think about him. In the words of Bill Cosby, “I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone’.
Let me share a true story. During my graduate program in New York Law School, I had fears of the unknown. I thought I wouldn’t be able to graduate from taxation, but when I looked back and see the people looking up to me, I told myself, I will not only graduate, but I will finish strong, which by God’s grace I did. The moral here is that I believed in myself despite obvious challenges. Furthermore, when I was writing my first book, I had fears about how the production will be, grammatical errors and how the world will receive the work, all these fears didn’t deter me from moving ahead despite many voices telling me 1001 different messages on how to proceed and not proceed with the production. At the end of the day, I followed my inner instincts and dared to succeed. And the work came out almost perfectly fine if not perfectly fine.
If you know who you are, you won’t need to explain yourself to people. Isn’t it true that the whole world sets apart for the man who knows where he’s headed?
If people have high self-efficacy in an area, then they think, feel, and behave in a way that contributes to and reinforces their success, and improves their personal satisfaction. They’re more likely to view obstacles as challenges to overcome, so they aren’t afraid to face new things. They recover quickly from setbacks because they view failure more as a result of external circumstances than internal weaknesses. In general, believing in your abilities affects your motivation, your choices, your toughness, and your determination.
The question now is how do you building self-confidence? I will list a few ways you can build self confidence.
Mastery experiences – things you have succeeded at in the past.
Vicarious experiences – seeing people who are similar to you succeed.
Social persuasion – hearing from others that you’re capable of.
Emotional status – staying positive, and managing stress.
Three of these sources (the first, second, and fourth) are within your control, so we’ll look at them more closely. However, while we can’t force people to say good things about us (the third source), we can increase the likelihood of receiving positive feedback by being more confident in general.
A few days ago, the internet was awash with the history of Cori Gauff, the 15-year-old American who set a record by becoming the youngest player to qualify for the main draw of Wimbledon. She was able to beat one of her idols Venus Williams in the first round at Wimbledon. Cori wouldn’t have been able to do this she lacked confidence.
In order to gain confidence, try practicing these few nuggets: Never try to be someone else; Always stick to your ideas when necessary; Have a sense of direction in life; Don’t be easily influenced by what others say; Be comfortable with yourself; Don’t seek approval from others; Groom yourself; Dress nicely; Think positive; Kill negative thoughts; Get prepared; Know your principles and live them; Speak slowly; Increase competence; Set a small goal and achieve it; Focus on solutions; Volunteer; Exercise; Empower yourself with knowledge; Work on small things and finally but not the least get to you know yourself because when you do, you will win all battles.
In conclusion. How confident are you? Are you ready to take a leap of faith to prove your confidence? Remember the words of Henry Ford “Whether you think you can, or you think you can‘t – you‘re right,”.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with New York City Department of Correction as the legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success.
News
Tinubu Extends Europe Vacation, Due Back at Weekend
President Bola Tinubu has extended his “working vacation” in Europe by a few days and is expected to return to Nigeria at the weekend, the Presidency said on Monday.
The announcement came as Vice President Kashim Shettima represents the President at the 81st United Nations General Assembly in New York, where he is scheduled to deliver Nigeria’s national statement.
Tinubu departed Nigeria on August 30 to begin his working vacation in London. After spending one week in the United Kingdom, he proceeded to Paris, France, where he held meetings with French President Emmanuel Macron and businessman Vincent Bolloré.
Bolloré’s media interests include Canal+, MultiChoice and Universal Music Group.
A statement signed on Monday by Bayo Onanuga, Special Adviser to the President on Information and Strategy, said Tinubu has remains in touch with developments at home and continued to direct the affairs of government despite being away from Nigeria.
One of the major decisions taken by the President during the period was his directive for an independent investigation into the deaths of 37 suspected illegal miners in Minna following their detention by the Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps.
The deaths had raised concerns over the circumstances surrounding the detention and treatment of the miners, prompting the President to order an independent probe.
Tinubu’s decision to extend his stay abroad means he will not personally attend the opening of the high-level segment of the UN General Assembly in New York. Shettima, who departed Abuja on September 20, is representing the President at the global gathering and will present Nigeria’s national statement.
The Presidency said the Vice President’s representation was part of the arrangements for Tinubu’s absence from the country.
With Shettima now in New York, the Secretary to the Government of the Federation, Senator George Akume, will continue to represent the President at some official functions.
The Presidency said Tinubu had also delegated the Vice President to represent him at official functions while he was away, while Akume had similarly stepped in at other engagements.
The President’s extended stay in Europe also comes amid increased political activities at home ahead of the 2027 general elections.
According to the Presidency, the Director-General of the Presidential Campaign Council, Senator Abubakar Yari, has been leading notable leaders of the ruling party in consultations with prominent traditional rulers across the country.
The consultations form part of ongoing political engagements as the administration moves towards the next electoral cycle.
The Presidency also reacted strongly to criticism over Tinubu’s decision not to attend the UN General Assembly personally.
It described as irresponsible what it called a “baseless insinuation” by former Vice President Atiku Abubakar and a United States-based lobbying firm headed by an ex-convict regarding the President’s non-attendance at the global gathering.
The Presidency maintained that Nigeria would be adequately represented by Shettima, who will deliver the country’s national statement.
Tinubu’s latest trip began as an official working vacation, during which the President combined his leave with selected diplomatic, business and governmental engagements.
His meeting with Macron in Paris provided an opportunity for discussions on bilateral relations, while his engagement with Bolloré focused on business and investment interests involving Nigeria.
News
Let Nigerians Breathe, Reduce Fuel Price, Atiku Tells Tinubu
Former Vice President Atiku Abubakar has urged President Bola Tinubu to take immediate steps to reduce the cost of petrol, saying Nigerians are struggling with the combined impact of high energy, transportation and food prices.
Atiku made the call on Friday in Abuja during a press briefing on fuel prices, palliatives and the rising cost of living. His comments came amid renewed concerns over the effect of higher petrol prices on households and businesses.
The African Democratic Congress (ADC) presidential candidate said the removal of petrol subsidy in May 2023 placed additional pressure on families, workers, farmers and businesses.
He said the effect of higher petrol prices was not limited to motorists, as increased transportation and logistics costs had also pushed up the prices of food and other essential goods.
“When government makes energy expensive, it makes life expensive,” Atiku said.
The former vice president recalled that he had previously called for government intervention to reduce petrol prices, but said Tinubu had dismissed the proposal as showing “serious ignorance” of governance and the economy.
Atiku questioned whether the Nigeria Labour Congress (NLC), petroleum marketers, manufacturers and ordinary Nigerians who had raised concerns about rising costs could all be described as ignorant.
“When workers, producers, marketers and ordinary families are all raising the alarm, government must listen,” he said.
He said the government should be prepared to review its policies when their consequences become difficult for citizens to bear, adding that rising production costs were putting further pressure on manufacturers while families were finding it harder to afford basic goods.
Atiku also argued that government revenue and GDP figures did not necessarily reflect the economic reality facing ordinary Nigerians.
“If government receives more Naira while the citizen’s naira buys less food, less fuel, less electricity and less transportation, then bigger government revenues mean little to the family struggling to survive,” he said.
The ADC candidate urged Tinubu to use the remaining eight months of his first term to reduce the burden on Nigerians and consider any measure capable of lowering petrol prices, even if the proposal came from a political opponent.
“What matters to me is that Nigerians pay less,” Atiku said. “A sensible idea does not become a bad idea because it came from your opponent.”
He also offered to make his policy framework available to the Tinubu administration, saying Nigerians should not have to wait for a new government before benefiting from policies that could provide relief.
“If you need the framework, I will provide it. Implement it under your government. Give it whatever name you choose. Take the credit,” he said.
“I ask for only one thing: Let Nigerians breathe.”
News
Food for Living: Pursue Passion More Than Profit (Pt. 1)
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
Passion and purpose are among the most debated topics in the human development space. It’s a grey area that has attracted a lot of attention. While some schools of thought believe it’s better to focus on passion, other schools of thought believe that it’s profitable for one to focus on a job that pays the bills.
According to the latter school of thought, passion doesn’t pay the bills. Well, depending on the schools of thought one subscribes to, I personally believe it pays more for one to pursue passion than profit, and I will explain in a minute.
I strongly believe passion is stronger than power because when one loves what one is doing, there’s an inherent strength that comes with it, but if one doesn’t like what they are doing, they’ll lack the moral strength to forge on.
Let me share a practical example with you. My late dad encouraged me to study Taxation Law at New York Law School, a major I didn’t like. He had the mindset that money rules the world, which I tend to believe because when money talks, the world “generally” seems to move around. That mindset and principle is relatable; however, it’s not applicable in other cases because there are some people or situations where money doesn’t move around.
My late dad believed it makes no sense for me to read a major and remain unemployable or poor. So, when I arrived in the United States, the economy was experiencing a recession, and there were no jobs at the time. So, while I was passionate about studying International Relations, Energy Law, or Communications Law, my late dad sat me down and said, based on the information he was receiving from his friends, these are great courses, but when I graduate, it will be hard to find a job because most people in those firms are laying off employees.
According to my late dad, his friends suggested that since I have a legal background, tax law is the only major I can study and be guaranteed a job because people and corporations will always file their tax returns. I initially objected to this advice because my brain is not wired for numbers. I really struggled to accept this advice because I hated numbers with passion.
My late dad would later tell me, you know we are from a humble background, and so we need money. My late dad would always say, “You wouldn’t want to study international law or communication, and the only thing you can do very well is speak English while remaining poor. One fact about my late dad was that he liked money to a stupor. According to him, after God, the most important thing in the world is money.
After much hesitation, I decided to study the major to make my late dad happy because I saw how happy he would be when I studied tax law. If truth be told, I wasn’t happy studying the major. I really struggled with the major. I managed to get a scholarship and graduated with a decent grade, but getting a job was challenging because employers could see that I didn’t like the major each time I went for an interview.
At the end of the day, I managed to get a job as a Case Manager for a private organization and later as the Legal Coordinator for the New York City Department of Correction. An important point to note here is that, after I left the tax firm, I was intentional about applying for jobs I was passionate about. Money to me was a secondary concern because I strongly believe that when you love what you do and you are good at it, money will surely find you.
I had to share this practical experience to give an insight into the importance of focusing on passion. Don’t get me wrong, money is good, but I personally feel there are more valuable things than money, and a perfect example is marrying a kind man as opposed to marrying a man with money, or marrying a lady with good character as opposed to marrying a lady with a good physique.
It’s instructive to note that when I began to focus on what I love to do, I had to spend time on honing my skills, developing myself by attending relevant training sessions and taking courses that would distinguish me from my contemporaries. It didn’t take long for me to receive recognition for my work. I was celebrated for being a trailblazing author of three books on television; I was interviewed by The New York Times in addition to meeting resourceful global leaders. In all sincerity, I doubt if I would have received accolades assuming I focused on taxation or doing what would give me money.
The moral of this analysis is that while profit is good, passion is much better because it will give one the necessary satisfaction and fulfilment they deserve. To understand how this works, one might make good money in a job but won’t be happy, but someone else might make little money and be happy in what they are doing. If research is done on what makes one happy, most people will likely say it is their passion or what they love to do that makes them happy as opposed to the job they do. It’s only a fragment of people who will attribute their happiness to the job they do, and that’s simply because they have truly figured out who they are or are probably happy and passionate about the work they do.
Let me explain a little: your profession is what you are trained to do as a doctor, lawyer, accountant, or engineer. Your vocation is what you are trained to do as a skilled worker or one with a 9-to-5 job, but your ministry is your calling, and that’s why you find your talent or gift and passion. So, one’s passion can be found in what they love to do.
When one’s profession is aligned with one’s vocation and ministry, then success is bound to be present because passion is at play.
It’s instructive to note that most of the great people I know in the world have become famous because they were doing what they love to do. I recently attended an award ceremony where my alma mater, Baruch College, celebrated alumni who have distinguished themselves. One of the award recipients, Ms. Doris Gonzalez, stated in her speech, “Of all the jobs I have had in my life, this is my best job. I really love my job”. I strongly believe there is a form of spiritual blessing and success that comes when one is happy doing what one is passionate about.
In conclusion, if one is desirous of succeeding in life, please endeavor to focus on your passion; if you can’t find it, explore what makes you happy. When you find what makes you happy, develop and monetize it, and in no distant time, opportunities and recognition will begin to triple in.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer, and author of Design Your Destiny- Actualizing Your Birthright to Success, Unleash Your Destiny and The Six Pillars of Success. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com






