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Food for Living: The Value of a True Friend

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By Henry Ukazu

Dear Destiny Friends,

Rare as is true love, true friendship is rarer – Jean De La Fontane.

One of the best things that can happen to someone is to have a good friend. The value of a true friend is priceless. It cuts across all sectors of life. Whether you are a student, entrepreneur, married, politician, clergy etc, you need honest, loyal, and trustworthy friends as you journey through life.

The hallmark of friendship is loyalty, and one’s loyalty to another will always be tested. That is why it’s highly advisable to marry your friend with whom you can be vulnerable. It is noteworthy that vulnerability is one of the strongest tests of marriage, because one must trust the person he is vulnerable to when he lets his guards down.

We all want great friends, but most times, we don’t act like one. The best way to get a great friend is to be one, but unfortunately, some people don’t understand what the word friend really means. They just used it freely. In reality, your best friend is someone who brings out the best in you.

Good friends are medicinal. They help to increase one’s life span. They are very therapeutic. They help our mental health. They help to increase our happiness. It has been determined that people who value both their family and friendship enjoy greater health and higher happiness.

In our contemporary society, many people lose true friends because they are dressed like work. Yes, true friendship is earned. It’s easy to make an enemy, but it’s hard to make a friend. While poverty minds think a friend is someone who gives you money, rich means think a friend is someone who corrects you, looks out for you, and gives you an opportunity. The big questions we need to ask ourselves is, what are the traits of friendship? What are the characteristics of friendship? How do you know a true friend?

You cannot overestimate the value of friendship. Here are some characteristics and points to note before you confidently say someone is your friend.

Trust & confidentiality: You need to know the people you tell your secret.

Loyalty: This is the true test and hallmark of friendship because just like your marriage will be tested, your friendship must surely be tested.

A true friend is someone who accepts you the way you are. A friend is someone who respects you, especially when you disagree with them. Mutual respect is one of the most powerful traits of a good friendship, and a lack of it raises a red flag. A true friend is kind and shares with you. He plays with you, and is on hand to protect your interest.

It’s a well-established fact that nothing good comes easy. True friends take time to grow. Just like the journey of a thousand miles begins with a step in the right direction, true friends must be tested like a marriage to stand the test of time.

According to Beth Elkassih, there are four traits to look out for in a friend as follows:

Reliability: A true friend is a dependable ally as opposed to a fair-weather friend.

Listening: A true friend must have a listening ear without being judgmental. A friend is that person who knows all about you and still loves you.

Authenticity: There’s nothing that pleases a friend more than authenticity. The reason many friendships don’t last is because “supposed friends” are not authentic. They only speak what their colleagues want to hear.

Trust-worthy: This is one of the pillars of true friendship. In my calculated opinion, it is the foundation and cornerstone of all success because you can confide in someone without being afraid of betrayal.

Friendship does not mean absence of disagreement, or that everything will be rosy, no, great friends experience challenges in their friendship to come come out great just like gold must go through fire to become gold. What’s important to note is that a true friend will be your cheerleader as opposed to being a critic. If you are not getting it right, a friend can be your third eye, and constructively criticise you with love.

To put it in perspective, fans are critics who can woo or cheer you up depending on your performance, but a coach will always cheer you up regardless of your performance. A coach sees your potential and helps you become a better version of yourself.

Just like a critic sees your weaknesses and attacks your worst self, a cheerleader sees your strengths and celebrates your best self. Would you rather be a critic or a cheerleader?

The following are some of the rewards of true friendship – It helps to kill loneliness and social isolation.

Friendship helps to reduce stress. It provides emotional support, and helps us in the race of personal development. It also gives us a sense of belonging when we know people are always there for us when we need them.

If you really want to know whether someone is a friend, just ask yourself if the person is adding value to your life and making you genuinely happy.

I will conclude with some great quotes on what a great friendship entails.

There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship -Thomas Aquinas

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success – Doug Larson

True friends are those rare people who come to find you in dark places and lead you back to the light.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker, youth advocate and creative writer. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Kaduna Rally: ADC Mocks APC over ‘Empty Seats, Rented Crowd, Recycled Promises’

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The African Democratic Congress Presidential Campaign Council (ADC-PCC) has described the All Progressives Congress (APC) Northwest zonal flag-off rally in Kaduna as a monumental disappointment, accusing the ruling party of relying on rented crowds, empty seats and recycled promises.

Reacting to the rally held at the Kaduna Township Stadium, the Director of Media and Publicity of the ADC-PCC, Kola Ologbondiyan, said an event intended to demonstrate the APC’s political strength across the Northwest had instead exposed what he described as the party’s declining public acceptance.

Ologbondiyan alleged that the APC mobilised people from the seven states of the Northwest and beyond, with payments reportedly ranging from ₦50,000 to ₦100,000 per person, yet the stadium, which he put at a capacity of 5,000, remained sparsely occupied.

“For a rally billed as the Northwest zonal flag-off, what we witnessed was a shameful spectacle. Despite the alleged mobilisation of crowds from across the zone and beyond, the stadium remained scantily filled, with empty seats everywhere,” he said.

He added that the turnout, which he described as disappointing, was compounded by what he called the unenthusiastic reception given to the speeches and messages of APC leaders.

The ADC-PCC Director also criticised President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s reported commissioning of road projects at the event, describing the exercise as troubling and questioning the administration’s claims of performance.

Ologbondiyan further alleged that some attendees expressed dissatisfaction with the ruling party after leaving the stadium, chanting the Hausa phrase “Ba mu yi,” which he interpreted as a rejection of the APC and its policies.

“You can rent a crowd, but you cannot rent acceptance. Even if people attend a rally, that does not mean they have surrendered their convictions. The real test of public support is what Nigerians will decide at the ballot box,” he said.

The ADC-PCC accused the APC of returning to Kaduna with promises similar to those made during the 2015, 2019 and 2023 election cycles, arguing that the ruling party had failed to adequately account for its years in power.

It also faulted President Tinubu for, according to the council, shifting responsibility for the hardship facing Nigerians to opposition leaders rather than addressing the economic consequences of his administration’s policies.

Ologbondiyan particularly criticised the President’s position on fuel subsidy removal, which the ADC-PCC maintains has intensified the economic burden on households already struggling with rising living costs.

The council urged the APC to stop what it described as wasteful political jamborees, apologise to Nigerians over the prevailing economic difficulties and begin to prepare for an orderly transfer of power in 2027.

It maintained that the ADC represents a credible alternative for Nigerians seeking a change in leadership, promising that the electorate would use the next general election to express its dissatisfaction with the ruling party.

“The message from Kaduna is loud and clear: Nigerians are saying ‘Ba mu yi’ to the APC and Tinubu. Come 2027, they will speak even louder with their votes,” Ologbondiyan declared.

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Food for Living: Find Your Calling

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By Henry Ukazu

Dear Destiny Friends,

If you are asked, what’s your calling, what will be your response? If you are asked what your purpose on earth is, what will be your response? If you are asked who you are, what would be your response? These, no doubt, are interesting questions to decipher one’s calling.

Finding one’s calling is the best thing that can happen to anyone. According to one of my most cherished mentors, Dr. Yomi Garnett, the day you find your purpose is the day you become a millionaire. I couldn’t agree more with this saying because it is nothing but the gospel truth. This is because the best thing that can happen to anyone is knowing their calling.

According to Mark Twain, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born, and the day you find out why. This is a fact. It’s quite unfortunate that many people are just existing as opposed to living. We were not created to exist, we were created to fill a vacuum, and we can only make an impact if we are intentionally answering our call.

Let’s circle back to the question I asked at the beginning of this article, what’s your calling? To answer this question, I would like you to approach it from a spiritual perspective. At creation, God called us to be something in the world, that’s why he gave us gifts and talents and told us to be fruitful and multiply.   

Just like we all have names that our parents, friends, children, mentors, etc. call us. These names are reflections of what we mean to them or how they perceive us. Names are symbolic and have deep meanings if we apply reasoning to them. So, if we can answer the names we are called to earth, how about answering the name God called us at birth. I believe that’s the most important call or name we need to answer as human beings. When we answer the name God gave to us, the world will begin to respond to what we say because we have answered the mother’s call.

Why do I say this? Your purpose was made in heaven, but your calling is meant to be fulfilled on earth. It’s sad to see people answering different names they are not called. When God created you, there’s something he had in mind for you to accomplish or solve on earth, but it’s unfortunate that, due to life’s vicissitudes, some of us derail from the path God destined for us, and hence that’s the reason many of struggle because we are not working in the direction and pathway God designed for us to tread.

It should be known that your calling was not a conference call; the call was personal. If God wanted anyone to know your calling or purpose, he would have revealed it to anyone he wants, but he chose to reveal it to you, so the onus is on you to focus on it, follow it religiously and ultimately fulfill it because that’s the only way you can get fulfillment.

I also asked, what’s your purpose? Your purpose is the reason why you do whatever you are doing. In this context, your purpose is your why.  According to Dr. Myles Munroe, “When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable.” Your purpose is the reason why you applied for a job, married your partner, started an NGO, a business, relocated/travelled, started school, or even wrote a book. There’s always a reason why we do something. That reason is the inspiration and motivation we need to forge when everything else fails.

Again, I ask you what’s your purpose? If you can’t figure out your purpose, I will strongly advise you to go to your creator (God) and ask him, what’s your purpose because he’s the person that created you. When people desire different interests in different majors, skills, profession, vocation, etc., it’s simply because someone puts the desire and interest inside them.

To understand how purpose works, there’s no problem on earth without a solution. The only problem without a solution is the problem the person with the solution hasn’t arrived.

Let me share a practical example on purpose. There was a story of an old man whose car (Ford) broke down in the middle of the road, all efforts to fix the car proved abortive. An old man was passing by and saw this man struggling to fix the car, he asked him, “What’s the problem?” The old man said, well, my car has refused to start. The stranger told the man to give a minute. The man initially refused saying who is this old man to fix what I have been working on for hours.

On second thought, he said, what will I lose if I give him a chance. He decided to listen to the old man who told him to give me a minute to check out the car. This stranger didn’t do much, he just touched a particular side of the engine and told the old man to start the car, and immediately the car cranked back to her life. The man was surprised and asked him, who are you? ” The stranger said, “I am Henry Ford, the owner of Ford Motors.

The moral of this story is, Henry Ford, the founder of Ford motors, knows his car more than everyone. So, if a mere mortal can know much, how much about the creator who will not know about our purpose?

When you find your purpose, you find your why, but when you find your why you must find your purpose.

The final question I asked: “Who are you? To answer these questions, I need you to focus on the inmate quality you are blessed with as opposed to what people think about you. What people think about you is your reputation, but who you are is your character.  Some people associate titles to who they are. I think that’s the wrong interpretation. One might be a doctor, lawyer, Chief Operating Officer, professor, or even the governor or president, but that doesn’t make them good people with good traits, qualities, values and charismatic inmate abilities.

To lead one must have empathy, compassion, and heart of service. It is through these traits; one can see who a person really is and not the cloth of title they are showing the world.

So, to find one’s calling, here’s my sample suggestion: ask your creator (God), inquire what makes you happy, what you love to do, what do people compliment you on, what do you do with relative ease if you are woken from sleep? What is one thing you can do for free?

In conclusion, finding one’s calling is the best thing that can happen to anyone. The day you find your calling is the day you will begin to live your best life because you will begin to bless the world with your calling.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer, and author of Design Your Destiny- Actualizing Your Birthright to Success, Unleash Your Destiny, and The Six Pillars of Success. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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2027: Tinubu Will Lose, Dele Momodu Insists, Says Hunger, Hardship Will Determine Outcome

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A chieftain of the African Democratic Congress (ADC), Chief Dele Momodu, has said no political permutation will save President Bola Tinubu in the 2027 presidential election, insisting that widespread hunger and hardship will determine the outcome.

Momodu stated this on Thursday during an appearance on Channels Television’s Politics Today, anchored by Seun Okinbaloye.

According to him, Nigerians across all regions and ethnic lines are united by economic hardship, which no amount of money or political calculation can overcome.

“The common factor now is the hunger in the land. No permutation can beat hunger. The Yorubas are suffering, the Hausas are suffering, the Igbos are suffering, everybody is suffering,” he said.

He argued that President Tinubu cannot buy the entire country, even if he was able to deploy money effectively in Lagos State politics in the past.

“Tinubu believes he can buy the whole of Nigeria, but my personal belief is that if he could buy the whole of Lagos, I doubt if he can use money to buy the whole of Nigeria,” Momodu stated.

The Ovation Publisher said Nigerians had become wiser and would collect any money offered to them during elections but still vote according to their conscience.

He cited the Osun State governorship election as a case study, noting that, despite the huge funds allegedly deployed, the people voted for Governor Ademola Adeleke.

“And a lot of people will take the money like they took it in Osun State. People’s eyes are wide open now. They brought a lot of money to Osun State, but they still lost the election to Ademola Adeleke,” he said.

Momodu also recalled that Tinubu lost Lagos State to Mr Peter Obi of the Labour Party in the 2023 presidential election, which he said proves that incumbency and financial muscle do not guarantee victory.

He maintained that President Tinubu would not win in 2027, claiming that many Nigerians could not imagine a second term for the administration.

“If you ask an average Nigerian today, do you trust Tinubu to conduct a free and fair election? 90 per cent will say no. Nobody trusts Tinubu, including his own supporters,” Momodu said.

On the detention of former Kaduna State Governor, Mallam Nasir El-Rufai, Momodu described him as a “prisoner of conscience” who is being persecuted because of his political influence.

“Nasir El-Rufai is a lion. They caged him because he is a lion. Even when a lion is caged, it is still a lion. They want him locked up until after 2027 because they fear his influence,” he said.

He disclosed that El-Rufai’s appointment as Deputy Chairman of the Atiku Abubakar Presidential Campaign Council was in honour of his sacrifice and resilience.

“It is a way of honouring his sacrifice because his travails are quite political in nature. That is why Nasir has become a prisoner of conscience. He is in the hands of a government that he helped to midwife,” Momodu added.

He said the 2027 election would be a referendum on hunger, hardship and governance, and not on political permutations.

Meanwhile, the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Digital Communications, Engagement and New Media Strategy, O’tega Ogra, has faulted Momodu’s comments.

Reacting to the interview, Ogra accused the opposition of embracing “perpetual negativity” and opposing government policies without objective assessment.

He said Momodu’s assertion ignored ongoing reforms and improvements recorded in key economic indicators, including foreign reserves, power generation and inflation management.

Ogra urged opposition figures to offer constructive criticism rather than painting a picture of total failure, stressing that President Tinubu would ultimately be judged by his reforms and track record.

The Tribune

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