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Food for Living: Understanding Yourself
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Followers,
The more you know yourself, the more patience you have for what you see in others.” – Erik Erikson
One of the best things to happen to any individual is the ability to know himself.
If you are asked, who you are. What will be your response? To truly understand yourself, one must be able to know his strength, weakness, passion, interest, vision, and most importantly, what he represents or stands for.
Just like life is a continuous learning process, understanding oneself is a life journey. We never get to fully understand ourselves and our capability. That is why when we achieve an uncommon feat, we are literally humbled. Again, when we are faced with a dare-devil situation like being broke, provoked, bullied, etc., one will be surprised to notice how he may react. It is therefore, difficult to say ‘I know myself’ because actions and reactions may sometimes differ.
As a Human Capacity Coach, my focus is to help every rational being discover their innate ability because it is only when they understand their innate ability, that they will be able to unleash their potential. It is important to state that we are all different and endowed with certain alienable gifts, talents and skills. Your duty is to uncover all the hidden potentials you have. Nobody knows you more than you know yourself. If you feel you have potential, dreams, goals, and inexplicable passion to birth a goal, but don’t know how to actualize, I will strongly advise you to find a coach to help you actualize it.
One of the worst feelings anyone can ever have is to live in regret. The greatest challenge most people have is that though they are truly inspired listening to great speakers, mentors, leaders, pastors, etc. they lack the implementation strategy, which is why we all need a coach.
Understanding oneself comes in different dimensions. A man/woman will not say he/she has fully and truly understood themselves until they marry. Sometimes, you may not know your potential until you have an encounter with a life-transforming coach, mentor, or with God who literally open your eyes to see a new version of yourself. To understand how understanding oneself really works, imagine being in a room with total darkness and the light is turned on, your countenance, feeling, focus, vision, understanding will be totally different because you’ll derive an uncommon strength from the light. That’s how you know the level of potential and capabilities in you when you understand yourself.
Understanding oneself, in the simplest of terms, is illuminating your lie positively.
The question now becomes how does one understands himself. I will be sharing some tips to guide you.
Know your purpose
Your mission on planet earth is for a purpose. You have an assignment and divine mandate to fulfill your purpose. You can’t be existing instead of living. It’s sad to note that the graveyard is the richest place on planet earth because that’s where many talents are buried. There are many dynamics to finding your purpose. To discover your purpose, you can reach out to your creator, listen to yourself, and know what you are not comfortable with in the world.
Take personality test
Some people find this resourceful. There are several tests available. I don’t know if it truly works. But you can consider giving it a try. For instance, the “Myers-Briggs Personality type theory says that all people have one of sixteen different basic personalities. These personalities can predict how you interact with people, the kinds of interpersonal problems and strengths that you have, and what kind of environment you live and work in best”.
Be vulnerable
Vulnerability is truly underrated in our society. Only strong people and leaders are willing to share their weaknesses, experience, and failures. You are not truly free until you have lived your life without caring what other people are saying. On your journey of life, you don’t have to be hard on yourself. Give yourself the permission to explore new things by taking risks and you’ll understand who you are and what you are capable of doing.
Many people expect too much from themselves and when they don’t achieve their set targets and goals in life, they feel they are failures. This shouldn’t be the case. It’s your life and nobody’s life. So, live it to the fullest. Tomorrow your mistakes will serve as an experience and learning curve. You’ll even laugh at them when you reflect. So, relax and enjoy the moments by traveling, getting an education, and having fewer expectations from people. Life is too short to live in regrets.
Be yourself
Don’t try to be like others. You must come to the realization that not everyone is going to like you. According to Oscar Wilde, be yourself, others are taken. Don’t try to fit in. Be the original version of yourself. This might be hard, but when you are your authentic self, your original friends will come close to you because they resonate with your work, but you when are fake, your original friends who are supposed to add value to your work will depart, and only fake people will resonate with you. Trust me, being fake is expensive while being true to yourself is cheap because you don’t have to spend or please anyone.
Do what makes you happy
One of the best ways to know oneself is by engaging in acts that make one happy. If I may ask you, what are your hobbies, what is the one thing you can do for free even if you are not paid for it?
How do you react?
It is widely stated that circumstances don’t say who you are, they reveal who you are. It’s not always right to assert how we’ll react when we are faced with different situations, because our reactions might be different when the occasion or situation rears its ugly head. One of the ways to know a man is to give him power, money, and riches. If he is able to overcome the pressures and temptations by managing them without them managing him, he’s truly a man.
In conclusion, regardless of what you may have experienced in life, don’t be hard on yourself; forgive yourself and if you feel you need someone to assist you in working through life, understanding oneself and how to unleash your potential by overcoming the challenges, setbacks, and failures of life, I’m here to assist you.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a Human Capacity & mindset coach. He’s also a public speaker. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Operatives of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission have arrested a former chairman of defunct Skye Bank Plc, Tunde Ayeni, over alleged money laundering, misappropriation and diversion of funds amounting to N36.54bn and $30m.
Ayeni, a businessman, was arrested in Abuja on Thursday, and is currently being held at the commission’s facility.
The arrest followed an EFCC probe into alleged misappropriation and diversion of funds said to have been obtained from Polaris Bank through multiple entities linked to him.
“Operatives of the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission, EFCC, have arrested a former board chairman of defunct Skye Bank Plc and businessman, Tunde Ayeni, in connection with alleged money laundering, misappropriation and diversion of funds to the tune of N36,540,058,400.00 and $30m.
“Ayeni was arrested sequel to the investigation of the EFCC into alleged misappropriation and diversion of funds to the tune of N36,540,058,400.00 and $30m obtained from Polaris Bank Plc by different entities linked to him.
“The funds were loans obtained allegedly for specific investment projects but subsequently transferred to other entities’ accounts. Investigations showed that, though the loans were obtained for purposes such as finance of marine security activities, electricity distribution contract, estate development, they were diverted to the NITEL/MTEL asset acquisition through NATCOM account,” one of the sources said.
Another source said the commission is currently probing 12 companies allegedly linked to Ayeni, which it said were used to obtain the loans from Polaris Bank.
“Twelve different companies linked to Ayeni are being investigated by the EFCC. They are entities he allegedly used to obtain loans from Polaris Bank for his shady activities. The loans are depositors’ funds fraudulently obtained and frittered into diverse wasteful purposes. Ayeni will be arraigned in due course upon conclusion of investigations,” the source said.
When contacted, EFCC spokesman Dele Oyewale confirmed the arrest but declined to give further details.
The Punch
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
To be fruitful is to be productive, profitable, and successful in all areas of your life. When one is fruitful, he will attract many opportunities and values. When we are fruitful, we won’t be barren because we will be producing fruits and results with our work. Even the book of life said no woman will be barren in your land. That’s being fruitful.
Fruitfulness permeates every area of our life. When you are fruitful, your life, marriage, business, academic, ethics, relationship/network will flourish. Our business must be fruitful to survive, otherwise it will be out of business. We shall discuss several areas where one can be fruitful.
Parents
The joy of every father is for the child to be greater than him. Any father that wants to be greater than his son is not a good father in my understanding. Parents, mentors, government, teachers, leaders of faith, etc. all want us to be fruitful.
Let’s take a case study of parents. They sacrifice their time, resources and health just to give us a decent life. They do it because they want us to be successful in life.
Personally, I watched my late father and mother deprive themselves of the luxury of life just to give me and my siblings a decent life. My late parents never had the opportunity of having a decent education, it won’t be out of place for one to say they are unlettered, but they knew the value of education.
My late dad will always say, he’s not concerned about building houses, or living a luxury lifestyle, to him, those are secondary needs of life. His primary concern is for his children to have a good education. My late dad will always say assuming he’s educated, he would have excelled higher in life.
My late mother is not an exemption. I vividly remember one day my late mother said to me, her colleagues are buying jewelry, shoes, clothes, making their hair, etc. to fit into trends, but she’s not concerned about that, her major concern is for her children to have a decent education and look good.
Most people don’t understand the inspiration behind why I do what I do today. My late parents were and remained my biggest supporter. Apart from going to heaven, my greatest goal is to make my late parents and children proud. The moral of this analysis is my late parents sacrificed even their life for me and siblings just because they want us to be successful and fruitful.
Mentors
Mentors are not left out of this equation; mentors can be regarded as gatekeepers because they have paid the price of success. It is the fruitfulness of mentors that attracts values and mentees to them. When a mentor accepts a mentee into his fold, he’s simply telling the mentee, “I want you to be successful, I don’t want you to fail. However, it is important to state that before a mentor can accept to mentor a mentee, the mentor would have seen some potential in the mentees.
It’s instructive to mention that there are five types of mentors namely:
- Position Mentor: People follow you because they have a right to follow you which can be because of the position you occupy.
- Permission Mentor: People follow you because you allow them. For example, in relationships when you decide to allow people to build relationships with you.
- Production Mentor: People follow you because of what you have done for the organization or association. This is result oriented.
- People Development Mentor: People follow you because of what you have done for them.
- Pinnacle Mentor: People follow you because of who you are or what you represent. The question now is where do you belong?
For the umpteenth time, I am a product of mentorship. My mentors have really shaped my life.
Teachers
Teachers are not left out. Teachers are generally regarded as professional educators who play a critical role in fostering student achievement, personal growth, and social development. They are seen as the “lifeblood” of the education system, often serving as mentors, role models, and agents of social change.
There are many components of teachers namely:
- Professional Experts: Teachers are trained specialists in pedagogy (the art/science of teaching) and subject matter, holding degrees and certifications that qualify them to guide learners.
- Facilitators and Mentors: Beyond delivering content, they act as guides who help students acquire critical thinking skills and knowledge, shifting from “information dispensers” to active facilitators.
- Lifelong Learners: Effective teachers are viewed as individuals who continuously learn and adapt their practices to new technologies, curricula, and student needs.
- Moral and Cultural Guides: Teachers are often expected to act as stewards of community values, maintaining student safety, and cultivating civic responsibility.
- “Backbone of Society”: They are considered crucial to a nation’s social and economic development by preparing the future workforce. Above all, they assist in making us fruitful human beings.
Leaders of faith
The leaders of faith are regarded as the molders of the human faith because they help to build our faith. When the scripture says in Genesis 1:8, be fruitful and multiply, the scripture is also referring to them because they are regarded as shepherds. As Christians, we expected to be fruitful because our heavenly father is fruitful. Being fruitful here entails bearing fruits with our life and this entails using our life to attract people into the kingdom of God as evidence of our heavenly father who expects us to be Christlike.
Government
Let’s talk about the government. When a government is fruitful, it will reflect on the lives of her citizens, but when the government is performing below expectations, the citizens will be on the receiving end. The principal responsibility of the government is protection of life and security for her citizens. Every other thing is secondary. The government is also responsible for creating job opportunities for the citizens. However, it should be noted the government cannot create for all her citizens, and as such they provide an enabling environment for the private sector to thrive.
Employers/Supervisors/Leaders
These sets of people are regarded as people of influence. You need them at your corner, if you intend to move higher in life. Your employers and supervisors are regarded as your leaders. You can never outsmart them; the best one can try is to be in their good books and tolerate their excesses. When an employee is fruitful and exceeding expectations at work, they tend to be rewarded by their supervisors or employers because of the value they create and the problem they solve
In conclusion, whatever you do in life, please try and be fruitful.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design and Unleash Your Destiny . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
Justice Darius Khobo of the Kaduna State High Court has adjourned the bail hearing of former Governor of Kaduna State, Mallam Nasir El-Rufai, to the first week of June, 2026.
El-Rufai is being arraigned on multiple charges bordering on alleged financial crime and abuse of office by the Independent Corrupt Practices and Other Related Offences Commission (ICPC).
“Similarly, another charge, number KDH/KAD/ICPC/01/26, against Mallam Nasir El-Rufa’i and one Amadu Sule (LEDA) has also been filed before a Kaduna State High Court in the Kaduna Judicial Division,” the ICPC said last month.
“The charges in the State High Court case range from abuse of office, fraud, and intent to commit fraud to conferring undue advantage, among others. Both charges were filed by the ICPC on the 18th of March, 2026.”
Speaking after the court session, counsel to the former governor, Ukpon Akpan, kicked against the lingering adjournment of the bail hearing by one presiding judge as politically motivated.
The high-profile case has drawn significant public attention, with heightened security presence observed around the court premises.
The former governor had arrived at the court at about 9 am in a convoy accompanied by ICPC officials and operatives of the Department of State Services (DSS).
During the proceedings, supporters of the former governor gathered outside the courtroom, while security agencies maintained order and restricted movement within the vicinity.
Inside the courtroom, journalists, as usual, were not allowed, as proceedings are expected to focus on arguments presented by both the defence and prosecution regarding the bail request.
At the last sitting, the defence team had maintained that their client poses no flight risk and is willing to comply with all conditions set by the court.
Meanwhile, the prosecution has urged the court to carefully consider the gravity of the charges.
The 66-year-old former governor of Kaduna has been in ICPC custody since February 19 following his release by the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC).
El-Rufai, a former minister of the FCT, was, however, released on March 27 based on compassionate grounds following his mother’s death
