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Food for Living: Your Life Is Not Over Yet
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By Henry Ukazu
Greetings Dear Friends,
I officially welcome you to the last month of the year. The year is gradually coming to an end. At the inception of the year, we all made resolutions and had plans and expectations of what we intend to do before the end of the year. Some of us measured our successes every quarter. The question we should be asking ourselves however, is if we have been able to accomplish our goals and desires. If your answer is no, just know it’s not over for you. If your answer is yes, just relish in the words of Les Brown, “it’s not late to set another goal”. Sometimes in life, we may not reach our goal, but at least it is expected we try our best. According to Bruce Lee “A goal is not always something to be reached, it often serve as something to be aimed”.
When 2020 came, we were all beaming with joy; no one saw the pandemic neither did anyone see the recession some countries experienced due to the pandemic. In the journey of life, nothing is guaranteed, as widely acclaimed, tax and death are the only things that are guaranteed because we all must pay tax and we all must die one day. In the same way, life may have thrown tantrums at you, you may have lost your job, lost a loved one, experienced divorce, experienced a set back in your personal and professional life. I don’t know what your situation or story is, but I just want to let you know that it is not over for you.
It is generally believed you can never have a second chance to make a first impression, but we fail to realize that we all need a second chance. A student needs a second chance, an employee needs a second chance, a businessman needs a second chance, a divorcee needs a second chance, the prodigal son was given a second chance, even Christ died for us to give us a second chance. Getting a second chance is about giving yourself the opportunity to grow beyond your past failures. It’s about positively adjusting your attitude toward future possibilities. According to Edgar Caycee, “Don’t feel sorry for yourself if you have gone the wrong road, turn around”.
As human beings, we are always in a haste to make the next step without even taking stock of previous steps or decisions we have made which may have consciously or unconsciously led us to where we are today. It is because the philosopher was so busy focusing on the journey ahead of him that he forgot there was a ditch in front of him, and the rest is history. Human beings are very important in our journey to success. According to Roy Bennet, “Good things happened when you surround yourself with good people”.
Challenges come in different shapes and styles, but what makes the difference is not only the way you managed it but what you learn from it. According to Robert Schuler, problems are stop signs, they are guide less”. Some of us go through different challenges, and we allow the experience, circumstance, or situation to define and shape us. Regardless of what you may be facing or have experienced, just know that your life is not over yet, there’s still a ray of hope for you. If you have ever watched a football or soccer match, you’ll realize that nothing is guaranteed until the referee officially ends the match. That’s simply how life works.
Furthermore, just like education is the greatest leveler, the child of a certified pauper can become a man of means tomorrow if properly educated. This simply tells you the only thing that is permanent is change. The mistake most of us make is that we measure and compare our progress with that of others. The only comparison you have to make is with yourself. That’s simply how to measure matured growth otherwise you may be heading into defective success.
If you are feeling downcast or thinking that your life is messed up, please note that there are people who are in a worst situation and have not given up. If you have plans of opening a new page in your life or business and you are afraid of what the future upholds, just take a leap of faith. Do you know you have a voice, and a message the world is itching to hear? There’s somebody crying and literally begging to be where you are today in addition to having what you have.
Sometimes in life, we feel it is over for us, we feel that there’s no other path, we feel we have lost it completely just because you lost a family member, business, or even an election, but we fail to understand that there’s a lesson and experience for us to learn. If you continue to worry and be afraid in your mind, it will be hard, Charlie Chaplin has a word for you “You will never find a rainbow if you are looking down”.
Learning how to overcome life is not rocket science; all you need to do is know what you want and what you don’t want. For example, you should know how to say no in a polite way without being offended. Saying no makes you focus on the needful because whatever “distracts” you can serve as an “attraction” if you are working on focus.
Another way of overcoming challenges is by finding what you love. In a world filled with so many distractions and negativity, you need to channel your energy on what you truly love and build on it. It’s by doing that you overcome unnecessary pressures and challenges. In order to move ahead, here are some guidelines
1. Let go of the past
Sometimes, we are used to holding on to past experiences or hurt we suffered. These guilt feelings make us feel we can’t move ahead; most of us are always tormented by this feeling. We fail to understand that every difficult moment in our lives is accompanied by an opportunity for personal growth and creativity. When life throws dirt at you, dust yourself and move on, nobody cares what happens to you, rather they are concerned about what you were able to do with what was thrown at you. When you do this, you identify the lesson or situation that put you in such a mess and never allow it to reoccur.
2. Accept accountability & eesponsibility
One of the greatest disservices we can do to ourselves is to lie to ourselves. Most times, we don’t tell ourselves the honest truth. Sometimes we put ourselves in a difficult situation and expect someone to clean our mess. For example, if you don’t manage your money, you’ll lose it, if you don’t manage your marriage, you’ll lose it, if you don’t manage your business, you’ll lose it. If you don’t manage your anger, you’ll lose it, if you don’t manage a good loyal friend, you’ll lose it. Accepting responsibly is the first step in owning a problem. You are the only one who can directly control the outcome of your life. Moral: You must take accountability for your situation and overcome these obstacles. Choosing not to is giving up.
3. Focus on the things you can change.
Another mistake we make is feeling we can solve every problem. For instance, a man who has an ego problem will find it difficult to ask for help when he needs assistance, and by the time challenge gets to the peak, the issue might have deteriorated. Getting assistance from professional or trained personnel will go a long way to fix any problem. Don’t channel your energy on what you can’t solve, rather channel it on what you can change or fix. In that way, you get peace of mind. Wasting your time, talent and emotional energy on things that are beyond your control is a recipe for frustration, misery, and stagnation. Moral: Invest your energy in the things you can change.
4. Figure out what you really want.
In some situations, we don’t know what we actually need. As a bachelor, you must know the kind of woman you want, and the same principle is applicable to a woman. As an entrepreneur, you must know what your skills set are, as a businessman, you must know what business you can manage in addition to having a good background and understanding, as a student, you must know the subject that interests you. Failure to do your due diligence might make you frustrated down the line, and it won’t take long for your life will be over.
The journey of life is truly not for the feeble minded. Just like marriage, you must brace up. From birth, you grow up, go to school, get a job, get married, start a family, have grandkid/ great-grandchildren before meeting your creator at the appointed time if life does not take us earlier. So, as you journey through life, don’t give up, no matter the challenges that come your way. According to Winston Churchill, “Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.
We all have different experiences which shape our life. To put it in a proper perspective, an encounter is an experience that makes your life story incomplete without the mention of that experience. To know if you have had an encounter, look at your life before that experience came and after it has made an impact on you. An encounter can result on account of somebody you met, a job, your spouse, or even a spiritual transformation.
In conclusion, I don’t know what your storyline is, but I will leave you with the words of Roy Bennet, “be happy for everything that happened to you, is an experience”.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He’s a mindset coach and self-discovery expert. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success and President of gloemi.com. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
The Nigeria Democratic Congress (NDC) presidential candidate, Peter Obi, has denied asking Nigerians living in the United Kingdom to abandon relatives who depend on them for financial support, saying his message about hardship in Nigeria was distorted by political opponents.
Obi said he appreciates Nigerians in the Diaspora who make sacrifices to support their families at home, stressing that his concern is the country’s dependence on remittances to meet basic needs.
In a statement titled; “My Message Has Been Twisted”, posted on X on Tuesday, the former Governor of Anambra State clarified that he never asked Nigerians abroad to stop supporting their loved ones.
“I deeply appreciate Nigerians in the diaspora who work tirelessly and make enormous sacrifices to support their families back home,” he said.
“Their remittances pay for school fees, hospital bills, rent, and feeding expenses. Their patriotism and sacrifices deserve our profound respect. I never asked them to abandon their loved ones.”
Obi said his message was aimed at drawing attention to the economic conditions forcing millions of Nigerians to rely on relatives abroad for their survival.
“My concern is that Nigeria should not remain a country where millions depend on relatives abroad for basic survival,” he said.
“Our goal must be to build a nation that provides jobs, affordable healthcare, quality education, and economic opportunities for its citizens.”
He accused political opponents of misrepresenting his comments, insisting that his position is about addressing the causes of hardship rather than discouraging financial assistance to families.
“Political opponents may twist my message, but the truth remains clear: I am not asking Nigerians abroad to abandon their families. I am advocating for a Nigeria that will no longer abandon its own people,” he said.
The clarification followed backlash over comments Obi made during a town hall meeting with Diaspora supporters in Manchester on Sunday.
In a video that went viral, Obi urged Nigerians in the UK to think twice before giving money to relatives and others at home who ask them for financial assistance, arguing that such support could ease hardship without addressing its underlying causes.
“You have people at home in Nigeria today who are begging you for money. Tell them no!” he said.
Obi attributed the country’s economic difficulties to poor leadership, urging Nigerians abroad to encourage their relatives and friends at home to vote for leaders who would prioritise productivity and economic opportunities.
The Court of Appeal, Abuja Division, has dismissed the EFCC’s appeal and affirmed the ₦12 million compensation awarded to Dr. Monday Ubani, SAN, for his unlawful 21-day detention in 2019. The court also awarded ₦300,000 in costs against the Commission.
Ubani was detained after securing administrative bail for a client accused of jumping bail. Despite a court order directing the EFCC to release him conditionally or charge him with any alleged offence, the Commission failed to comply, prompting his lawyer, Chief Professor Mike Ozekhome, to institute a fundamental rights action in his favour.
On January 5, 2022, the Abuja High Court, presided over by Justice Sylvanus Oriji, ruled in Ubani’s favour. The EFCC appealed, challenging the trial court’s jurisdiction and the amount of compensation awarded.
In dismissing the appeal, the Court of Appeal rejected both arguments, holding that the compensation was justified and that the EFCC’s investigative powers do not permit arbitrary detention or disobedience of court orders.
The judgment reaffirms that law enforcement agencies remain subject to the Constitution and judicial authority. It also underscores the protection of fundamental rights, the limits of law enforcement powers and the consequences of unlawful detention.
Beyond the financial award, the decision highlights the responsibilities of sureties and the obligation of security agencies to obey court orders, making it a potentially significant reference in future fundamental rights litigation.
By Henry Ukazu
Dear Destiny Friends,
One of life’s most misunderstood concepts is the relationship between process and failure. When some people fail, they think they have done something wrong, but it could be that the person is experiencing the process, or their season has not yet come.
To understand this concept, let’s explain the two terms. A process is a series of structured actions, steps, or decisions taken in a specific order to transform input into a desired output or goal. Here are the key elements of a process
- Inputs: The raw materials, data, or starting requirements (such as ingredients, customer requests, or raw code).
- Activities/Steps: The specific tasks or decisions performed by people, tools, or machines.
- Trigger: An event or demand that kicks off the process (like submitting an order or launching an app).
- Output: The result, product, or delivered service.
- Owner: The person or role accountable for the outcome.
Failure, on the other hand, is the state or condition of not meeting a desirable, required, or intended objective. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, failure can result from any of the following:
- Omission or Neglect: Failing to perform an action that was promised, owed, or expected (such as a failure to pay on time or submit a report).
- System or Organ Malfunction: A situation where a machine, computer, engine, or bodily organ stops working properly (such as engine failure or kidney failure).
- Insolvency: A financial state of bankruptcy, such as the failure of a business or bank.
Having stated the above terms, one can decipher that process is a necessary tool for success. When a process is lacking, failure is inevitable.
I recently listened to a sermon by a Nigerian Pastor. According to the pastor, there’s something that looks like failure, but in a real sense, it is not failure; it is process. Sometimes in life, when we fail in business, examinations, careers, marriage, or even when our health fails us, the reason why they all happen is that we have failed to do the needful, or we need to go through a process.
Let me explain. Let’s say one has a business; if one has not taken the time to learn the trade very well, the person might fail for not learning a necessary skill required for the business, acquiring formal or informal education, or having a form of apprenticeship from a mentor, which might be all that’s necessary for the entrepreneur to succeed. This is what is called a process.
Also, a student will need to read, research, and do assignments to pass an examination. An employee will have to learn a job as an entry-level employee and work his way through to become the Chief Executive Officer. All this involves a process.
Marriage is not an exception. There’s no successful marriage without a form of mentoring or training. A man/woman must undergo a process of marriage counseling to learn about how to win in marriage. In this training, they will learn about communication in marriage, money in marriage, sex in marriage, money in marriage, and personalities in marriage
I strongly believe that there’s time for everything. There is an appointed time for everything. When something is not in its season, don’t expect to deliver. When one puts pressure, it’s bound to fail.
I can vividly remember what my most revered mentor, Dr. Yomi Garnett, counseled me on the importance of patience. A little background about the case: at that time, I had no job. I was working as a security officer. I tried to use my connections to secure a decent job, but it was very challenging. I reached out to Dr. Yomi, whom I call the sage because of his scintillating and rational wisdom. After ranting to him about my litany of problems, he said to me, “Henry, if you like, meet President Obama, Trump, etc.; if God is not ready to give you a job, you won’t get a job”. He went further to say, you can’t rush God. When the time is ready, God will align everything for you.
According to my mentors, there’s something God and the universe want me to learn. I must go through some process of refining for the task ahead. These refining processes might be preparing for the greater task by learning what needs to be learned, or it could be a case of God teaching me wisdom or something of value that will be useful to me in the near future which I may not be able to see now.
When I look back in retrospect, I can authoritatively say my mentor was right.
Sometimes in life, we prepare for the opportunities, while sometimes, we don’t prepare. We just learn on the job. But I honestly think it’s good to prepare before one embarks on any journey. That preparation is called a process.
To understand how the process works, do you know that if you plant corn in the season that is not the rainy season, you will believe it’s a bad seed, but no, that’s not the case because you planted the corn in the wrong season. Even the bible says there’s a time for everything.
Also, someone might finish university and become frustrated because he doesn’t have a job. What the person might not know is that their season is yet to manifest. It could also be that the student might need refinement, which comes with the process.
It’s instructive to note that when your season comes, nothing can stop it; there will be alignment, and the universe will work for you. What you did many years ago that failed to attract attention will begin to attract attention and draw you in.
Today, I pray, may you command attention in your season, not after your season.
Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny- Actualizing Your Birthright to Success, Unleash Your Destiny and The Six Pillars of Success . He can be reached via info@gloemi.com
