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Opinion: Thriving in Trying Times – Pt. 3

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By Tolulope A. Adegoke

“Don’t believe in what you are called; it can trap you! don’t trust your titles. You have not done what you could do yet! What they have seen so far is only a fraction of who you are. Don’t allow what you have done prevent what you could do”. – Tolulope A. Adegoke

It is pertinent to note at this juncture that leaders initiate change. Leadership naturally demand change. Nigerians are not the problem, but the leaders. You can only lead people as far as you have gone yourself. If you do not improve, your organization will never improve. I have discovered something about developing countries because I was born in one and still live in one; when you give them a title, they stop learning. Nothing is worse for a Third-World man than giving him a promotion and a title, because he believes he has made it. Call someone a Manager or CEO or Honourable or Reverend or Bishop, they stop learning. And that’s when an organization stops working or growing. When you are given authority or title, you should buy more books, take more courses. Because you are not just leading your own life, you have lives to lead to a higher future and a higher level. This is why true leaders never graduate from the school of life, they are always learning. Dr Myles Monroe (of blessed memory) says “I read four to five books a month, I have been doing that for the past 22years…that means one book per week” because I must be re-educating myself. I am an eternal student.” You are reading this article, right now because you are willing to expand your mind. You cannot grow beyond what you know unless you grow what you know. To lead in trying times, you have to be a reader because readers may end up becoming leaders when they apply what has been learnt in the course of studies. This is why you should never allow anyone to prevent you from studying and growing. Also, never believe that you have made it. Don’t trust your titles. Don’t believe in what they call you, it can trap you. I am a recipient of several awards, but I do not allow them to get into my head, because the greatest enemy of your progress is your last success. Don’t trust what you have achieved. Don’t believe anybody’s accolades, because it is a trap. You have not done what you could do yet.  What they have seen so far is only a fraction of who you are. Stop being (a) mediocre! It’s time for you to stop complaining, and start studying. Don’t allow what you have done to prevent what you could do. The act of leadership is taking followers from where they are to a place they have never been. As a true leader, you have to be able to take people to where they have never been. That’s your role. Leadership is not about maintenance, it’s about innovation, exploration (that is, going beyond the box).

Leadership entails an adventure of thriving in creating a future, even in trying times, when all hope seems to be fading off. I strongly believe that many of you (readers) are tired of most of the trying moments confronting you. I sense strongly that you complain so much about it, it may be about your nation, family, continents or low-level leaders or government who tends to be taking you on a journey to no-where. But, if truly you desire a genuine change, you have to be willing to take an adventure into the unknown.

Thriving (could) entails some form of Discomfort.

Leaders will always create discomforts that are worthwhile. Why? Because they are uprooting people from their own familiarity. This is why true leaders seem not to be liked by a majority. They disturb your laziness; they also irritate your comfort. They make people do things that are uncommon, probably those things that these ones have never done before. They make people change their behaviours. In short, they frustrate your comfort-zones but re-shapes our cultures, ethics, norms and values. True leaders thrive the most in trying times because they are ‘disruptors’, they are catalysts! They always act as leverage to taking you from a place you know to a place that you do not know. The major problem with the majority across the world is that they like the familiar. It’s amazing how much we say we want ‘change’, and when it’s time to change we tend to hate it.

The Crisis Increases- it is called Trying Times

Thriving comes with a brand of leadership that naturally creates Change, and this comes with Crisis. We tend to talk about a crisis in the world today, even globally in diverse facets of life. But sincerely, all of that is not true. To me, there is no such thing as a Crisis. It doesn’t exist! A lot of people are doing so well, achieving great feats in the middle of a crisis, simply because they could see beyond the ordeals. Such people, like me, see opportunities! The Mentality Factor is key! Leaders create a crisis so that there can be more opportunities to thrive, they are not victims of them. Simply ask me how?

Leadership is an exercise in the management or the creation of crisis. A true leader says we would construct a six-lane road network. That’s a crisis! Because many people are used to the single lane-road, where they sell and hawk their goods in the middle of its pot-holes. Now, it’s a crisis because the government is trying to make a change happen on such a road network and many people may not be able to sell and hawk their good anymore. But it takes a leader to take such a drastic step for good change to occur within the system. This action creates discomfort for those benefiting from the bad road network. It is a crisis to take people to the level that they have never been, even though it may be a good place. Leaders initiate change…this change tends to change or reshapes the patterns of people’s lives, daily.

The Change Factor

You are a leader only if you initiate change. Managers only maintain things, while leaders change things. This is why a manager and a leader are completely different. Managers focus on systems, while leaders focus on people. Managers focus on the bottom-line, while leaders focus on the arising. Managers focus on what to do, while leaders focus on ‘why’ we are doing it. They think differently. And I strongly believe that you are finding this write-up interesting because it’s time for you to move into leadership. This moment on this write-up was a divine appointment because you are tired of being what you are. Probably you have been faking it for the last few years, telling your folks that you are having a good time. But why is this happening to you? it’s simple. You are bigger than who you really are. You are far stronger than what they say you are. You can do much more than their predictions about you. You are far better than what they said you are. And I am doing this write-up to irritate and infuriate you. You do not change until you are angry. Anger could be a crisis, but it could also be a weapon for a good change. Whatever you tolerate will never be changed by you. This is why ‘what’ you call crisis comes into your life. A crisis comes to take you out of the ordinary and forces to dream bigger! It forces you to be creative and innovative! There is no problem in your life or around you, they are only opportunities to be better and bigger. But you must be ready and determined to walk the work.

You all must come to understand that Change is your best friend! It is the only thing that is guaranteed and has your best interest at heart. Some nations are excelling bigger in this trying period because they are not seeing a crisis in the common senses or language of the ordinary thinkers or seers- these categories of nations are only seeing opportunities! And they all keep maximizing it, whether you like them or not for it! You must also come to understand that a ‘thing’ is exactly what you call it! They say opportunity, while the shallow thinkers say CRISIS!

Come on! You need to align yourself with Creative people. You need to start reading and studying the right books! Being with the wrong people and the bunch of complainers would only keep you stagnated and wanting or wishing for life if you are not careful. I charge you to change your relationships. As a matter of fact, you can never rise above the company you keep. If you are the smartest person in a group, then it’s time to leave such a group. Waking up from mental slumber is one of the greatest make-ups, which fine-tunes our beings into stepping up in the right order and lanes or platforms to thriving at any point in time of our lives.

Thank you for taking out time to relearn and re-educating yourself via this series. I wish you would apply it to real-life issues as they unfold with time.

Watch out for the Book titled: “The Power of an Empowered Zero” (From Zero to HERO) by Tolulope A. Adegoke. Foreword by Dr Yomi Garnett (CEO/Chancellor, Royal Biographical Institute, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania U.S.A., U.K., Abuja, Nigeria.) Edited by Ola Aboderin.

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Food Living: The Energy of Life

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By Henry Ukazu

Greetings Destiny Friends,

Without energy, no human can function effectively. In fact, its absence means we all die. This energy is not limited to human beings alone, however. Plants, animals of whatever kind need energy to survive. The energy of a plant could be sunlight or manure, or water. When any of these are lacking, the plants won’t grow well. Animals need energy to survive. This energy could be feeding on other animals for survival.

When that energy is gone, that plant or being is dead. According to WebMD, a human being can generally stay for 30 seconds to 2 minutes before they give up the ghost. If a fish is taken out of the water, it won’t last long before the fish begins to die depending on the kind of fish. Some last between 0- 30minutes. Do you see that we need energy to survive?

Energy is like communication. Anything you want to kill, stop communication, it will naturally die. It’s just like a man/or lady who is not interested in another partner, the fastest way to kill the relationship is to starve the communication. Communication is generally life. Even in marriage, everything is centered on communication, whether partners are discussing money, sex, personalities, conflicts or even communication in marriage, everything will be centered on communication. The right communication will trigger the right energy for the union to blossom.

So, whatever we don’t give naturally dies. As a Human Capacity Development expert, I have observed that one of the reasons why most people don’t succeed in their profession or life generally is simply because they are not focusing on the important reasons. They are mainly focused on the wrong reasons.

Let me share a practical reason. There are some set of people who begin a business with the mindset of money, some people don’t have passion for the business, some don’t have enough background in terms of experience and formal education, some engage it because they see other people doing it and believe they’ll succeed it even without having the required skills, talent or gift their colleagues have.

Please, tell me how this person will succeed in his business when they already have a faulty foundation. The inspiration and motivation to succeed will be difficult when they hit rock bottom because their reasons for engaging in the business or employment are faulty.

Let me put more perspective to this, imagine loving a man because he has money as opposed to his values and character. When tomorrow comes and the money is no longer there, the marriage has a tendency of hitting the rock. The same principle is applicable when a man marries a lady because of her beauty and her body physique as opposed to her character. If tomorrow comes and beauty is no longer present, there will be little or nothing to hold the marriage together if it begins to tear apart.  The symbolic meaning here is that the energy both parties need to keep the marriage going is missing because they have misplaced priority.

In education, if a parent chooses a major for his/her child that the child does not like, the student will not have the desired energy and interest to give their best as opposed to when the student is responsible for their major. Also, if an employee works in an industry he does not like, his productivity level will be low compared to when he works in a company he likes, his energy will generally increase. This is just the irony and reality of life. Energy is contagious.

To succeed in any endeavor, we must have the right energy. The energy can come from any angle. One’s motivation and inspiration might be different from another person’s motivation. When you have the right energy, one will wake up every morning without feeling like they are working. That’s why it is always good for one to do what they like because they’ll be inspired to push every day with little or no push.

Even in our spiritual life, energy plays a crucial role.  Every spiritual power has a spirit that controls or governs it. Without the spirit, the energy of the person will be low. This spirit operates in different ways, for instance when one is praying or singing, it is the spirit that inspires one. That’s why, when the enemy wants to attack one, they’ll attack their prayer line first; when the prayer life of a person is weak, it will be easy for the devil to strike.

If I may ask you, what’s the inspiration, motivation or the reason you do what you do every day? What gives you the energy to push on despite the setbacks you experience?  For me, my energy is simply because I want to influence the world positively, especially the youths. I do know that when I become successful, a lot of youth will listen to me. Also, I would like to be a transformational and influential world leader the world will regard as an agent of change.  According to one of my mentors, Chief Dele Momodu, he once said to me, he doesn’t want to be poor and as such, he dreads poverty with passion, and that’s why he can afford to sleep two or three hours a day.

Today, I charge you to have the right energy for life. In relating to people, please look at their energy, at the workplace, please look at their culture and values, in family, please pay attention to their values and even in spirituality, look at the energy people radiate. When any of these energy affects your spirit, please preserve your energy for a more important cause.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator. He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer, and author of Unleash Your Destiny, and The Six Pillars of Success. He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Politics Gone Sour? Kwankwaso’s Daughter Zainab Files to Divorce Kano Gov, Abba Yusuf

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Zainab Musa Kwankwaso, the second wife of Kano State governor, Abba Kabir Yusuf, has reportedly filed for divorce at an Upper Area Court in Abuja, offering to return the dowry paid during their marriage.

The daughter of former Kano State Governor and Senator Rabiu Musa Kwankwaso instituted a civil suit marked CV/97/26 at the Upper Area Court, Gudu, Abuja.

The court has reportedly summoned Governor Yusuf to appear on November 17, 2026, in connection with the divorce proceedings.

Zainab and Yusuf got married on July 29, 2006, when she was serving as an aide to her father. Their union produced six children.

The development comes against the backdrop of an ongoing political disagreement between Governor Yusuf and his former political godfather and father-in-law, Kwankwaso.

Yusuf secured his election as governor on the platform of the New Nigeria Peoples Party (NNPP), largely benefiting from Kwankwaso’s political influence. However, tensions reportedly emerged after Yusuf later defected to the ruling All Progressives Congress, APC.

Reports indicate that the political disagreement between Kwankwaso and the governor, which began about a year ago, has also contributed to growing tensions within the marriage.

Further reports revealed that Zainab moved out of the Kano Government House on October 28 and relocated to her father’s residence along Miller Road in Kano.

She subsequently travelled to Abuja by air without her police orderly or other security operatives.

The reported divorce filing marks another development in the strained relationship between the governor and his father-in-law, whose political differences have attracted considerable attention.

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2027: Sowore Accuses Tinubu of Hypocrisy Amid Calls for Peaceful Campaigns

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Activist and the African Action Congress (AAC) presidential candidate, Omoyele Sowore, has accused President Bola Tinubu of hypocrisy, alleging that he only began calling for peaceful, issue-based campaigns after being confronted at a mosque in Abuja.

Sowore made the allegation in a post on Friday, November 13, questioning the President’s silence over reported attacks on opposition figures and supporters allegedly involving members of the All Progressives Congress (APC).

He challenged Tinubu to explain why he kept mute when political violence reported in Osun, Ekiti, Lagos, Enugu and Delta states.

Recalling the October 30 attack on his team in Ado-Ekiti, Sowore alleged that the assailants were sponsored by the APC and members of the City Boy Movement, which he claimed was sponsored by Tinubu’s son.

Sowore said he has demanded an independent investigation, regretting that the principal suspects he identified have not been brought to justice.

The presidential candidate further cited the disruption of a Nigeria Democratic Congress (NDC) town hall meeting in Lagos, where Peter Obi was expected to address supporters, as well as reported political violence in Enugu and Delta states.

“You cannot preach peaceful, issue-based campaigns only when political hostility reaches your doorstep,” Sowore told Tinubu, accusing the President of condemning violence only when it affects his own side.

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