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Food for Living: True Success Lies More on the Journey Than the Destination

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By Henry Ukazu

Greetings my good friends!

It is a great pleasure to be here once again. Please pardon my inability for not being able to write last week. I know some of you might be a little disappointed, honestly, it was due to circumstances beyond my control. I received so many several calls, emails and messages. I promise to do better next time.  In whatever in life, I always look at the end in mind, in that way I will be properly guided on where my aim and vision in life lies. This is the more reason why I take my time in writing every week even when I am stressed up because I am addicted to sharing motivational and inspiring articles. As you all may know success in life has to do more with the journey rather than the destination.

Today, I chose to write on the relativity of journey and destination as facilitators of success.  Just like any other aspect of life, life is indeed a process. You may heard of the saying success is more of a journey, rather than destination.  Some other rational minds opine that the end justifies the means. These assertions are relatively true, however, it all depends on the angle you are looking at it from. We shall be comparing on both factors today but we shall be concentrating more energy on the process (journey).

It is an indisputable fact that in life the journey of a thousand miles begins with a step in the right direction.  It is also a fact that little drops of water makes an ocean. Just like a leader needs a team to achieve success, same way success needs to be processed in order for it to be truly justified. With my little knowledge and understanding of mathematics, the process of arriving at the answer via the formula generates more point more that the actual answer itself. True success doesn’t work in isolation. It works in harmony and unison with other component parts and characteristics which I call siblings and friends.

As human beings, sometimes we seem to neglect how far we have come in life. We are always eager to see what we lack as opposed to appreciating what we have. Human beings by nature can be ungrateful. The same analogy is applicable to the journey of success. Let’s take the example of an accomplished author who is now a bestseller. The journey to the top wasn’t easy. He/she had mentors who inspired him/her to write the book, publishers, family members, friends and associates who contributed in one way or the other to the work a great success. To me, they are the real MVP’s as far as I am concerned. They are the people who deserve the main accolades and should be appreciated, but sometimes some irrational beings tend to forget those people who contracted to their success. Also, if a student excels in life to an enviable position in the world (President, CEO, Governor) etc. It will be nice for such person to remember his/her teacher who groomed him/her. It is on this context we shall be discussing about journey and destination to success.

It is interest to note that Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay literally went where no other human had been when they became the first people to reach the peak of Mount Everest. Can you imagine what they must have felt? Pride, accomplishment, fulfillment. Question, did they achieve it alone? No, I guess. Think about the most important achievement in your life. Remember that feeling when you finally reached the summit of your academic career, political ambition, financial status and professional career. If you will agree with me, you didn’t do it alone, there were people behind it and it was truly a journey and process.

Last week I was listening to Joyce Meyers – a charismatic preacher. She was speaking on everyday life. In that message, she said true success lies in the little deeds and things you do daily as opposed to one major task you do. According to her you need to do small task nor matter how little it is in your daily routine which will add up to the goal you have in mind.

To understand how the journey of success really works, imagine yourself being a man or lady who needs a particular shape, it is expected that you’ll hit the gym at least three times a week and do some work out. You’ll follow up the also the process with a good hygiene. In fact, I personally feel the highest gym is in your kitchen.  Let’s face it, it’s common to feel resistance when undertaking a new exercise habit. This is because there are several steps required. You have to pack your gym bag, travel to the gym, change into your workout clothes, warm up, exercise, warm down, shower, and change back into your normal clothes before traveling back home.  This is the attitude and mindset which a rational mind desirous of making an impact should have. It is the process that defines the destination. Isn’t it true that you can easily spot a dedicated and discipline student or athletic. who is doing what he or she needs to be do in order to succeed in life?  It’s always important to take note of the journey or inventory of all stocks.

It is quite unfortunate that many people regard the destination more than the journey. In as much I agree that the outcome/ finished product is very important, it is worthy to mention the sacrifice, challenges, failures, people and the experience that came it with it.

Let’s discuss some worthy points that will assist us in appreciating the role of process and journey to our dream destination.

Get specific

Having the end in mind is very important. Being specific helps your overall goal and road map in order to get to your destination. When you are specific, you will know what to focus on. One quality of every great man or woman is that they are very focused and specific in whatever they plan to achieve. Employers’ are always looking for specific beings to solve specific problems. The more specific you are, the easier it is for people to assist or work with you.

Break it down and start small

If you have a goal to accomplish, it is always better to start small and grown. You can do this by breaking it down and taking it bit and bits. Try to do little things every day nor matter how little and stressful, it gives some level of satisfaction. Breaking the journey in pieces helps you to appreciate the journey.

Celebrate the progress and enjoy the journey

When it’s not all about the goal, you can take it all in (and take what you’ve learned with you).

When you have a big goal, it’s tempting to think you haven’t succeeded until you’ve achieved it. Otherwise, you might think you have failed forgetting that the set backs propels you to appreciate the progress and accomplishments that awaits you. According to Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic, professor of Business Psychology at University College London, he observed that small milestones are powerful for seeing a change in the positive direction, noting that “the point is not to get better than others, it’s to get better than the old version of yourself.” Keep track of what you’ve accomplished with a done list, which is a log of the tasks you’ve completed. Seeing your progress boosts motivation, heightens positive emotions, and sustains your productivity. A Harvard study found that we spend almost 50 percent of our time thinking about the past and future, instead of focusing on the present, which leads to increased unhappiness

Reflect daily

Actively thinking and reflecting about your business, idea, product, academic major etc. Reflecting daily can help you plan very well. As a rule of thumb, it’s always helpful to set a sizable amount of time during the day to reflect on the activities of the day before you sleep and also spending at least fifteen minutes of the day to mediate and think when you wake up every morning. By so doing you can motivate and inspire yourself when you think the lines are not adding up. You can do this by asking yourself “What is one step I can take today to get closer to my goal?” “What did I learn today?” You can also check in on a weekly or monthly basis to assess what you’ve gotten out of your journey thus far.

Whenever you are tempted to give up in life, always remember the words of Brian Tracy, “It doesn’t matter where you are coming from, all that maters is where you are going. The past is in the past for a reason, the present is here for a reason which is a gift to work with for tomorrow which is not guaranteed.

In conclusion, always bear in mind “Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. In the end it’s the courage to continue that counts.”

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with New York City Department of Correction as the legal Coordinator. He’s the author of the acclaimed book Design Your Destiny – Actualizing Your Birthright To Success.

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Food for Living: The Power of Positive Affirmation

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By Henry Ukazu

Greetings Destiny Friends,

One of the best things that can happen to anyone is to believe in themselves. Often, we don’t see the value and potential we have due to several factors including detractors’ utterances, disbelief in oneself or even past mistakes. Sometimes, we want other people to believe in us before we can believe in ourselves. Ordinarily, this shouldn’t be so.

If one is desirous of stepping up their game, one must understand how to use affirmations. Affirmations are powerful. And more powerful when they are positive. When you affirm to yourself, the universe has a way of affirming your thoughts, imaginations and words. However, it should be noted that affirmations are not about stating what you want, one must also work towards the affirmations, and believe the universe will align with you. One can practice affirmations by either writing it down or speaking it into existence.

Affirmations can be spiritual; they work like faith. If you don’t have faith, affirmations won’t work. You can attract opportunities, blessings, and favors from people when one affirms right. When people see your faith in action, they will generally feel the impulse to support your convictions.

Regardless of whatever situation one may be experiencing, it’s always good for one to feel good about oneself. It’s easy for one to feel discouraged, frustrated and depressed when the lines are not adding up, however, one can change the narrative by affirming to oneself, I expect my every need to be met; I expect the answer to every problem; I expect abundance; I will not lack; I will be great, I will attract blessings, favors, opportunities, etc. All these positive words are meant to trigger us to always think positive thoughts about our life regardless of our situations or what we are experiencing.

As human beings, sometimes, we don’t know the power we have. We tend to give other people power over us. In some cases, we want the world to give us opportunities or platforms to thrive, we fail to understand we are the platform we are seeking. For instance, sometimes we look for big companies, organization to showcase our work or give us opportunities to thrive, and when they fail, we become demoralized. However, if we can look into ourselves, we will realize in this age of technology we can showcase our work and when our supposed idols and organization see our work, they will rate us and give us potential opportunities.

It’s sad to see people begging for platforms to showcase their work. Sometimes they go extra to seek for roles and opportunities as interns or volunteers just to get an opportunity to have their name on their resume.  They don’t know they can use the internet to showcase what they have. It’s instructive to note that when you showcase what you have, the platforms you are looking for, will begin to look for you. And when you showcase what you have, speak into it and affirmatively believe it.

This is how affirmation works. When you showcase your work, say I believe my work will thrive, I will get recommendations, my work will attract attention, my business will not fail, my articles will go viral etc. Trust me, when you do this, the people and organizations you are looking for, will start to look for you. As a seasoned creative writer, each week I publish articles, before I send my article to my editor, I do say a word of prayer over my work and trust me, the grace to write and succeed has truly been felt from my tribe. I say this because I do get positive feedback almost on a weekly basis. creative.

Let me share  personal experience with you, I have been blogging for quite a while before big media platforms began to give me recognition and opportunity to publish my articles on their media platforms.  I believe some of them saw my little effort before they gave me an opportunity.

On a personal note, I have practiced affirmations, and it has worked for me. Let me share a practical example, when I was studying taxation law as a graduate student in New York Law School, I remember when a friend of mine asked me a question, Henry, if your exam is tomorrow, how do you feel you will perform? In all honesty and sincerity, I do know if my professor is kind to me, I will score a C or D, but I told her, I will score an A or B the least. You will be surprised to know, I scored an A- and B+ during that semester. That’s the power of positive affirmation. T

There’s another scenario where I shared on Facebook, I would like Mr. Peter Obi a former Governor in Nigeria who was aspiring to be the President of Nigeria. In three months, the universe connected me to him, and the most interesting thing about our meeting was that he gave me his number and advised me to keep in touch.

In conclusion, in your search for validation and opportunity, endeavor to practice affirmation and see it work like wonder in your life.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Food for Living: Remember and Acknowledge Your Source

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By Henry Ukazu

Greetings Destiny Friends,

There’s always the urge to get certain things done as a living person. Most times, the urge transcends to impatience and desperation as the thirst for fame, power, wealth and success increases. This happens to the extent that the average human being either forgets or fails to take into consideration the process and most importantly, the foundation or origin of their inspiration.

It is worth noting that before anyone decides to go on a journey, several factors play a role; before anyone decides to study a course in college, he must have a sponsor assuming they don’t have the personal financial muscle; before anyone becomes a millionaire or billionaire, there’s always someone responsible for the opportunity; before one becomes a Chief Executive Officer of a company, he must have climbed through the ropes from internship either in the said company or another, and it’s also instructive to note that someone gave him the opportunity to showcase his charismatic work skills; before anyone decides to go into politics, different people play roles either in form of mentors or citizens. There’s always a significant source in the making of a the person. The list is endless.

Why is it necessary to highlight these significant points? The answer is quite simple; nobody achieves greatness on his or her own. Nobody is self made no matter what one may claim. Even God in his infinite knowledge used Virgin Mary to birth Jesus Christ. So, if the saviour of mankind can come in the form of man, why should anyone think he is self made?

It’s sad to see certain people think they have arrived either because they now have money, power, influence or attained a certain height. They begin to act like demi-gods, and sometimes, play God in the affairs of men. They fail to remember they were once nobody, and had nothing.

It’s always good for one to remember their source, and this is very important. Sometimes, when we see people doing great and big things in the world, we wonder what their secret or source is. While some people will be bold to acknowledge their source, others might be a little bit hesitant and decide to keep it as their best kept secret, especially when it involves trade and merchandise.

To know the secret of anyone, look at their lifestyle, some people attribute it to God, some to mentors, mentees, good food, exercise, academics, rest, parents or spiritual leaders. For me, I am unapologetic to state three things responsible for who I am today; the first is God. We live in a society where some people find it hard to acknowledge God publicly for reasons best known to them. I truly know I am not the smartest, strongest or most intelligent, but I can authoritatively tell you, I have seen and experienced the hand of God upon my life.

Another great source of mine is my late parents comprising my late grandmother, my late father and my late mother. They all played significant roles in my life with their prayers and blessings. I can say with all boldness, they are my biggest inspiration and reason I do what I do today. It’s sad to see young men and women who fail to recognize and appreciate their parents because they are either old, not academically exposed or for whatever reason best known to them. Well, I won’t judge anyone, but I do know that the earlier one receives the sense to appreciate their parents, no matter their shortcomings, the better the positive influence it would have in their lives.

Finally, my third major source of strength is the people I work with, especially my immediate team. Like I always say; I’m not just smart, I am only smart by association. I have a team of ingenious minds, who I am very loyal and committed to in any way I can. What attracts me to them is their mindset, attitude and most importantly their talent/gift. If I may add a fourth category, I will say my mentors, there are certain people I look up to based on their position, accomplishment, personality. I call this set of mentors my pinnacle mentors because of who they are, or what they represent. If you would like to know the role of mentors in my life, please read one of my most insightful articles Mentors Are Life Savers.

Let’s get this clear, anyone can be a source. It might not really be a man of substance. Your mentee, child, partner or employee can be your source. What’s important is for one to recognize their role. Like I stated earlier, my team who I work with are my third greatest source, and I strongly believe God is using them to lift me up.

One may be wondering why I took my time to address these salient points. The reason is not farfetched. It’s regrettable to see people who have attained certain heights, and they seem to forget their roots. Some even forget their source. Like accomplished journalist, Dr. Dele Momodu, would always quote his  late ‘unlettered mother’, who admonished him to “never forget the son of who you are”. That’s a very deep statement.

Acknowledging one’s source is very critical to one’s growth. It speaks volumes about one’s mindset and personality. Let’s take a case study where someone assisted you to become great, and ends up insulting or using sarcastic words on you. They may even be uncharitable to you. I get all these narratives, still acknowledge them.

Acknowledging one’s source can be ambiguous. As Christians, sometimes we pray to our creator, give up our daily bread. By doing so, we are remembering our source, but quite often sometimes when we eat this bread and become well fed, we tend to forget from whom it came, and in some cases, fail to give credit to whom it is due. This is the attitude of ungrateful minds.

I will conclude with a prayer thus; in our quest for greatness and search the material things of the world, may we not forget our source, who gave us opportunities when we were nothing. Can I hear you say amen!

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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Food for Living: Continue to Grind

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By Henry Ukazu

Dear Destiny Friends,

When one grinds, he is practically working or studying very hard, often in a repetitive way for a better future outcome. It can also be the act of hustling or striving for success, according to internet overview. This principle explains the phrase, ‘rise and grind’, which encourages individuals to wake up and work hard to achieve goals.

Having said that, please permit me to be a bit personal about my next exposition. It’s for an instructive reason.

As a Christian, and practicing catholic, I’m trained on the mysteries of the Holy Rosary. In one of the mysteries – Sorrowful mysteries, we have five other mysteries namely: The Agony in the garden, scourging at the pillar, crowning with thorns, carrying of the cross and death and crucifixion of Jesus Christ.

One may be wondering what the symbolic and relative nature of the above mysteries are. Well, the answer is quite clear; the mysteries of the sorrow mysteries symbolize the difficult terrain Jesus Christ must go through for the salvation of mankind. As a Christian, each time I meditate on the sad experience of Jesus Christ for the salvation of mankind, it makes me rethink about life, especially whenever I am tempted to sin against God.

As human beings, we also experience the same trajectory in our effort to succeed, and this entails the act of ‘grinding’. Life never promises to be easy, and it will never be easy. As a matter of fact, the higher one goes, the tougher the hurdle.

It is an undisputable fact that nothing good comes easy. Whether you have an interest in running a business, raising a decent family, earning a degree, or improving on your personal development, one must grind, and this entails exploring all legitimate means. Sometimes, life does not give you what you want, but it will surely give you what you deserve.

So, when you grind, and life doesn’t give you what you desire, don’t give up, continue to grind. The mistake most people make is giving up quite early when the odds seem to be against you. Sometimes, when you don’t get what you want, there might be several reasons. It might be a case of one not being prepared or competent for such a position. It can also be a case where the universe has something different for you which one might not see in the immediate sense.

Again, when one doesn’t get what they desire, it is not because they don’t have the capacity, or competency, it might be a case of the timing not being right. On a personal note, I have applied for job opportunities and was rejected; I have tried to meet with resourceful people, but access was denied; I have written hundreds of articles, but only a few went viral. The stories are many, but one thing is certain; I learnt a lot from those experiences.

In your grinding, you might think nobody is watching or noticing your efforts, trust me, your efforts and work are seen. In due time, the work will be rewarded. I can testify to this statement because over time, I have been in the wilderness tilling the ground to make an impact. I am surprised to get award nominations in addition to being an award recipient on several occasions.

In some other cases, I get recommendations on the streets from people who see my work. One of the major challenges may be having the right person to spot your work. One may be wondering how it works. Let’s take the case of a man, who is trying to woo a lady. The lady in question knows what she wants in a man or the qualities and values. So, when you approach a lady, and she says no, what a rational mind will do is to explore other options that appear to be beneficial to both parties, and who knows in the long run, she might give consent.

Grinding can mean a thousand and one things depending on which aisle one is resting on. According to a notable ghost writer, Dr. Yomi Garnett, “The best pictures of you are yet to be taken. The best stories about you are yet to be told. The best of your years still lies ahead. So, affirm to yourself today: The good days are here, but the best is yet to come.”

So, while waiting for the best pictures, stories, and years ahead, continue to put in the work of learning, exploring opportunities, having faith in the creator and universe, and continue to grind. By so doing, the right opportunities will be attracted to you when the timing and the universe feel it’s for you.

Henry Ukazu writes from New York. He works with the New York City Department of Correction as the Legal Coordinator.  He’s the founder of Gloemi. He’s a Transformative Human Capacity and Mindset coach. He is also a public speaker, youth advocate, creative writer and author of Design Your Destiny Design Your  and Unleash Your Destiny .  He can be reached via info@gloemi.com

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